Angel Wings
by ChaosreigN
Summary: Squall has a lot on his shoulders and suffers from depression and more self-deprecating thoughts that one person should have to handle. A drunk night on a long bridge gives him the chance to end everything, but a mystery woman with honey for eyes and the voice of an angel manages to find a way to keep him from meeting a watery grave.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N;** I don't own Final Fantasy VIII, but I have played it religiously since I was like five. It taught me how to read and definitely influenced my sarcastic ass in more ways than one. This was Inspired by a Fiction written by a wonderful author in another fandom; SunnyD545. I am in no way copying their work, but said work has given me such a wonderful push to write this story here.

This will not be all sunshine and rainbows. There will be blood, lots of cursing and some adult themes that I don't recommend for people who don't enjoy said blood or even violence. There are a lot of different roads this story can take and I'm super excited to see where it will go because right now all i have is an idea and a lot of caffeine. Please enjoy!

* * *

 **Squall**

* * *

I was drunk. No, no that's not right. I was past drunk.

As I stared at the stars over the bridge leading to the mysterious continent of Esthar I was plagued with the possibility that jumping wouldn't be so bad.

I mean, what was I really doing with my life? As I pondered this I swayed over to the railing, my eyes studying the dark waters far below the expansive bridge. It had been shut down for as long as I could remember, not that my memory was very good recently.

We were in Fisherman's Horizon, celebrating after another successful mission under my lead as 'Commander.' I grunted, thinking of the title as more of a noose than an honor. Everyone was always counting on me, always waiting for _my_ orders. I wasn't the head of SeeD, I wasn't ready for this kind of responsibility.

Not that anyone would listen to me. How many times had I tried to get this stupid mantle pried away from me only to have Cid rest it back upon my shoulders? How many times did I have to deal with hopeful stares and saluting Cadets as a war waged on around us? My orders sent these kids to their deaths!

I mean, not that I was much older.

Nineteen seemed young for a Commander, but Cid insisted I was the only one suitable for the position I was sure he had made up on the spot. I groaned, my head starting to hurt as the pounding music from FH seemed to be turned up louder. Everything was just too much.

I had been having a lot of dark thoughts recently. Each day they seemed to grow larger and feed off of whatever energy I had stored. Selphie and Irvine (He had originally been on loan from Galbadia before the Garden vanished a year ago and he decided to stay) would often find me sulking in my room and drag me out to do something, anything, to keep me moving. Quistis and Zell would find me training alone and force their help, keeping their eyes on me as best they could. I felt like they knew something was wrong with me, but they just didn't say anything about it. But really, what is there to say?

I laughed, it was a hoarse strangled sounding thing that escaped my throat without permission. I frowned, thinking of my comrades. They were patient with me, but that came from years of learning not to pry. They only got what I would willingly give out and any questions they asked were met with nothing but glares and silence.

Would it be so bad to let them in?

' _Yes_ ' my brain decided to answer immediately. ' _You're alone. You can't trust anyone to take care of you,_ ' it continued as it always did and thoughts of my childhood hit me like a train. I didn't want to deal with this anymore. I didn't want to continue living day to day, waiting for the Sorceress to wipe me and my SeeDs out. I didn't want to be alone.

Another laugh, this one quieter and more under wraps, left my lips. As much as I hated the title of Commander they were _my_ SeeDs. And Balamb Garden was my home. Could I really just give everything up because I was _sad_? How would they go on without me?

' _Everyone should just take care of themselves_ ' the words were hard as they bounced around inside of my head, my feet taking me closer to the railing as my gloved hand gripped a light post. It would be so easy to just let go of everything and fall. It was such a long drop that the impact was sure to kill me, and if not the fall then the freezing waters below would do the trick whether I decided to fight against them or not.

Was I ready to throw all of my hard work away? ' _What was it all for anyway? You're alone, and you're always going to be alone. Big Sis wasn't there to save you and now no one will be_ here _to save you_.' The voice had a point, as it always did.

As I leaned over I absently wondered when this voice had taken root in my head. It didn't really matter seeing as it was always right.

"Hey," a soft voice called and I turned, my drunken vision creating two blue blurs standing under the yellow light of the lamp I was holding onto. There was black too, outlined by the sand colored railing on the other side of the bridge. Slowly my vision set back to normal after the movement stopped. A stranger with dark hair and honey colored eyes stepped forward slowly, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth as she did. She looked so ordinary and yet my eyes didn't leave her face. Her features were soft and a small smile pricked at the side of her lips as she brought her hands up carefully in a motion that said 'calm down.'

"…Hi," my voice answered back without permission and I scowled at myself. Her smile tugged down for a moment, misunderstanding my facial expression and something in my chest tightened. But then her smile was back, a little bigger this time as she took another cautious step.

"You okay?" her voice was smooth and her eyes were filled with concern. I wanted to answer her but I was finding it difficult to speak. My tongue was tied up due to the alcohol so all I could manage was a quick shake of my head.

That did not make the situation better. Everything spun again and my stomach was in revolt of the movement but I held my ground, my eyes boring into the woman in front of me. She slowly slipped off her long blue… whatever it was. It pooled around her feet almost like water as she took another step forward, every move so slow and careful.

"You can talk to me," Her soft voice reached my ears again and it was almost like music. "I won't judge you. I know life gets kind of hard." A frown returned to her face for just a second before she forced it away with a shake of her head. "You don't need to do this."

"I do," I groaned out in a bit of a slur. Her head tilted slightly as she stopped her advance. Honey eyes boring into mine.

"Why?"

"Why do you care?" this wasn't solely me talking. It was a mix of alcohol and self loathing topped off with genuine curiosity that I wouldn't have even bothered addressing if not for my mouth taking the initiative to string words together for me. I suddenly missed when my tongue was too tied from the alcohol to work properly. I thought of shaking my head again but my stomach was in complete revolt of that Idea. Instead I kept my eyes glued to the girl.

"Because no one deserves to die until they've had a chance to really live their life." There was a wistfulness in her voice that should have alerted me to the fact that she was struggling with her own issues. But my world revolved around me so I grunted, leaning a little bit further back than initially intended.

"You don't even know me," I growled out.

"I could, if you give me a chance." Her small sad smile took the bright light from her eyes and for a split second I did want to know her. To know the reason she smiled so brightly, yet had such sad eyes. I wanted to know her story.

But like with everyone else the voice reminded me that she was just another person who would rely on me. Who would put all their faith on my shoulders and let me carry the weight of the world for them.

"My name's Rinoa," she gave a small grin, deciding to close the distance between us with one large step, giving me an up close view of those deep honey eyes that were darker than they looked from a distance. "What's yours?" she asked, blinking a few times.

"Squall," I huffed out without thinking.

"It's good to meet you Squall," she smiled and offered me her hand. My drunken brain decided that maybe tonight wasn't the night. Maybe I could go on a few more days before this girl turned out to be like all the others. Surely there were other places I could off myself if it came down to it.

The thought was morbid so I pushed it away, instead deciding that I could try for a few more days. I released my hold of the light post to shake the girl's hand, only to realize I was still leaning too far back. She yelled, trying to grab my hand in time, only to pull my glove off.

I fell through the cold air as my brown hair whipped around my face violently.

My drunk brain couldn't really process that I had fallen, instead deciding it was all just a very vivid dream.

That would definitely explain the soft white glow coming from the girl on the bridge.

It almost looked like angel wings.

* * *

I awoke in the infirmary, my head pounding from what I was sure was the worst hangover I could ever imagine. I couldn't remember what I did the night before, only that I had been plagued with my usual dark thoughts. I had also been alone.

I checked the room quickly to make sure that no one was around before pulling up my sleeve to check for any new cuts. It wasn't something I was proud of or that I would admit to anyone, but I had a problem. A very big problem.

Depression clung to me like the opposite of the energy exuded from Zell or Selphie. I should seek help, but at this point in my life I had just learned to keep things bottled up inside until I had nightmares or got too drunk and did stupid things like cut myself.

One would think the very real pain of battle would be enough to satisfy my needs for physical pain over emotional, but it didn't always work that way.

I ground my teeth together in anger at myself. I shouldn't be like this. There were too many people depending on me. I should get help before I do something stupid like off myself.

My headache pounded hard as something tried to recall in my brain but I decided now wasn't the time. Satisfied that I hadn't brought anything sharp to my skin I pulled the thick jacket back down to my hands. It took me too long to notice that I was only wearing one glove. This brought another scowl to my face as Dr. Kadowaki walked into the small room, a clipboard in her hand.

A smile touched the edges of her aged face as she looked me over. I could feel her gaze linger on the scar that ran diagonally from my brow down over my nose and it caused my scowl to deepen. When I didn't say anything she took that as her cue to begin.

"You came in for alcohol poisoning," Kadowaki grimaced at me. All I did was blink, waiting for the rest of what I was beginning to assume was going to become a lecture on my responsibilities. "A pretty girl brought you in looking very worried. It seems you were stumbling around the bridge to Esthar talking about Galbadian and how upset you were about the outcome of the last battle." She raised one eyebrow before turning back to her clip board. Something prickled at the back of my neck. Odd, that didn't sound much like me. Any of the stories Irvine or Zell would bother to tell me about nights spent drunk usually involved me leaving early and not making it back until almost dawn. It wasn't something I did often, but once I was in a mood the alcohol almost calmed the demons in my head. I was always very quite in their stories, more so than normal I guess.

When I didn't make any move to speak Kadowaki shook her head back and forth, looking somewhat disappointed. "You need to be more careful Squall. If you ever need to talk you know I'm here," she sighed as I nodded, forcing the covers off of me and shoving my feet back into my boots. They always say that. ' _I'm always here_ ' but how many of them really mean it? I nodded to her once before leaving the infirmary behind me. My boots echoed in the halls as cadets, young students, and other SeeD members stopped to salute me on my walk. I only nodded and grunted in response to them. The Garden was a lot quieter than it use to be, mostly due to the fact that a real war had started, and because the Garden could actually move now.

A year or so ago we ran into an issue with Galbadia as their president sent missiles towards us because of an assassination attempt gone haywire. That's how we ended up getting Irvine Kinneas, a sharp shooter from a Garden that didn't exist anymore.

Well, we were sure it still existed, we just weren't sure where it went. Unlike Tribia and Balamb, Galbadia Garden wasn't targeted by the attack. Balamb Garden had barely survived, but Tribia was now a ruin, any members of the school that wanted to continue their education to become a SeeD now enrolled once a year in Balamb itself and the Garden would pick up the students.

Speak of the devil Irvine was leaning against a wall, looking very much like the cowboy he pretended to be. He was a bleeding heart and a womanizer if I've ever seen one. Somehow Selphie had caused an odd change in the man who was once known throughout all of the Gardens as a sharp shooting heartbreaker.

Now he was chasing Selphie around wherever her spirited heart took her like a sad puppy dying for affection. I grunted as he stood, standing in my way. Even though my inner circle still looked up to me as a 'fearless Commander' they were more informal than everyone else, which I appreciated. But in honesty I just wanted to be alone.

"We picked up a hitch-hiker in Fisherman's Horizon," he grinned at me. Before beginning his next sentence he looked around, making sure a certain green-eyed, brown haired girl wasn't around to hear him. "Rumor is she's a hottie."

"Good for you," I muttered quietly, hoping he hadn't heard me. From the look on his face he hadn't because he was grinning from ear to ear.

"Another rumor says you've already met said hottie."

"Irvine," a warning tone from behind him caused the cowboy's shoulders to sink and his eyes to roll. Quistis stood behind him, arms crossed and eyes squinting through her glasses in a glare that got most students to silence faster than any other facial expression. Besides my own glares.

"Yes, Miss Trepe," he spun on his heels, brandishing a smile.

"Selphie is looking for you," A knowing grin on her face as he sighed, bringing his arms up in a shrug.

"Ah, well, my love beckons. We'll talk later," Irvine threw a grin over his shoulder as he sauntered away, a little bit of pep in his step at the thought of seeing Selphie. I shook my head.

"Squall," Quistis gave a small, sisterly smile as she stepped forward. It was now that I realized there was a folder she had clutched to her body, her hands holding onto it for dear life. As an instructor she was privy to more information than most of the other SeeDs that waited around Garden for new orders. Being my previous instructor and one of the people in my 'inner circle' that gave her access to just about everything. Hell, I didn't even have that much access. I groaned internally as I held my hand out for the file. Slowly, as if weighing her options, she handed it to me, her blue eyes clouded over in thought.

I opened the file to see documents ranging from official looking treaties to a napkin with doodles on it. A name stuck out on the first page as I was sifting through the papers looking for something that could actually be interesting instead of just legal jargon and the doodles of a twelve year old.

Rinoa Heartilly.

Something familiar tugged in my memory at the name, but I didn't have time to press into further as Quistis was behind me, pushing me towards the elevator that would take me up to Cid's office and a possible mission briefing or meeting of some sort.

Sometimes I wish I could just sleep forever.

* * *

 **A/N;** Whoo Hoo!

Okay so before we go any further this story has been begging me to write it ever since I started replaying the game and reading a fanfiction by the before mentioned SunnyD545. It's a Soul Eater fic that has me screaming for more every time I read it! I am literally in love with it and it has inspired this story so much. I finally hunkered down to begin writing it and the first chapter came out wayyyyyy faster than I thought it was going to. So here it is for your viewing pleasure.

Now, next big note to bring to light; depression sucks and this story is not in any way romanticising the idea of Suicide, self harm, or a very real illness people deal with everyday. It is, however, an idea I couldn't get out of my head after reading SunnyD545's wonderful 'Jumping Feet First.' If you're into Soul Eater I definitely recommend it because it's so wonderfully paced and so full of all the right amount of angst and Soul being Soul.

I have no idea what my update schedule will be for this, but I do know there will be a lot more chapters after I finish getting a real plan into action. Anyway, let me know what you think! I love feedback and I love trying to please my readers even more!

Much love, ChaosreigN

xoxo


	2. Chapter 2

**Rinoa**

* * *

Cid Kramer was a lovely man, full of kindness. As he fussed over the late arrival of his 'Commander' I simply smiled, shaking my head so that he knew it wasn't that big of a deal. My mind wandered back to the man on the bridge as I worried my bottom lip. I saved him using something special and sacred, a secret I had been trying to hide and supress for such a long time. When I finally had him back on the bridge he was passed out, the smell of alcohol obvious on his breath. He was an attractive man, but very heavy. It took me a long time to get him to drunkenly stand. His eyes remaining shut most of the walk as he mumbled something about Garden and 'Angel's.' That last part had me worried, but he didn't seem to bring it up again. By the time I had made it to the main road of Fisherman's Horizon a kind boy with an interesting face tattoo spotted me and recognized the man I was half dragging-half helping.

He seemed a little shocked at first but quickly helped me get him into the Garden's Infirmary. He even helped me get this little meeting with Cid. He had chuckled a bit after handing me a pass while saying something about how their 'fearless Commander would take care of everything.'

My mind wandered from the drunken man who had almost died to what the Commander could look like. SeeD was a prestigious institution with the top military training in all the world, if you don't count the mounting Galbadian army.

I rocked back and forth on my heels as Angelo, my faithful dog, picked her head up from the food bowl she was eating from to look at me. I wrinkled my nose at her and she huffed, returning to her food with vigor

I had been walking on that bridge for days, trying to decide if I should continue on towards Esthar or stop at Fisherman's Horizon for a while to make a new start there. Anywhere to get away from home was my plan, but I wasn't sure what I was going to do after that. I sighed as the automatic sliding doors opened to reveal the man from last night, his deep blue-grey eyes sharp and all traces of alcohol gone from his system. He looked right past me to Cid, who stood up to greet the man. I studied him silently, watching the way he moved his brown hair away from his face to study the Headmaster. There was an informality between them that could only mean one thing.

Internally I groaned, wondering if saving his life was really worth it when his eyes finally fell on me. No recollection of last night seemed to cross his mind, or at least his face, almost as if it had been locked away. Maybe he had been so drunk he blacked out, acting out a deep dark desire somewhere in his heart he wasn't consciously aware he wanted. I stood as he saluted me, his deep gruff voice nothing like the whining I had heard on the bridge. Was this even the same man?

"I'm Squall, current Commander of the SeeDs stationed here in Balamb Garden. What seems to be the issue?" he raised an eyebrow while Cid sighed.

"Did you even look over the file," the old man gave a low chuckle as he walked around his desk and pulled the file from the younger man's hand. Seeing his face head on gave me the idea he wasn't much older than me, maybe 20 or 21. To be so young and hold such a high ranking title was quite a feat, yet he didn't seem to hold it as proudly as my father did.

I swallowed thickly, trying to not think about my father right now.

"I prefer the clients tell me in person. If not than there's really no need for this meeting," The commander huffed, his eyes staring daggers at the old man. Cid paid him no mind as he leaned against the front of his desk and smiled at me.

"Well Rinoa, why don't you tell him your story?" I nodded, swallowing down the thick ball of nerves that had decided to take residence in my throat.

"My name is Rinoa Heartilly and I am the daughter of one Fury Caraway. At the age of fifteen I left home to join one of the many resistance groups of Timber, trying to thwart Galbadia's hold on the country. Unfortunately my group and I were unable to complete our desired result of Independence ourselves. A group of SeeDs, however, managed to do what we couldn't alone. We landed in a lot of hot water, and in the aftermath our group split up. I haven't been in contact with them since." I sighed, thinking about Watts and Zone. They were helpless without me, street smart and yet… they couldn't seem to truly find a place for themselves until I had shown up to take the reigns. Now I was worried, but that wasn't why I was here. "My father got wind of my involvement and before I was able to evade him I was forced back into his… care." I ground out my teeth, forcing the memories away. The Commander stood stock still, nothing showing on his face as he waited for me to continue, so continue I did. "I am seeking asylum and perhaps a bodyguard so that I won't have to return. The reasons are my own," I finished the last sentence as the imposing man in front of me opened his mouth. He shut it again to look over at Cid, who simply shrugged, a warm smile on his face.

"What can you offer us in return," Squall rose an eyebrow only slightly as he continued his staring. I took a deep breath, a small smile tugging at the corner of my lips.

"I am well versed in Para-magic and could be useful as an outside contractor," I fumbled for the right words. I had thought about this many times while hoping to come across the mobile Garden. How my luck seemed to change last night was beyond me. "I could be very useful in the coming fight against the… Sorceress." I swallowed the last word as Squall turned towards Cid. Cid gave a warm smile, lighting up his entire face while Squall simply frowned.

"Of course, Child. Feel free to stay here with us as long as you like. We'll be leaving FH soon."

"Why did you need me here if you already had the decision made?" Squall hissed through his teeth, just barely loud enough for me to hear it. Cid chuckled, ignoring his Commander's response as he shuffled his was towards me.

"Our Squall is a little on the temperamental side, but I'm sure he and his friends will be able to make you feel right at home." Cid offered me his hand and I took it, shaking it with as firm a hand shake as I could muster. All the nerves that had been keeping me uptight seemed to flow out of my body as the Headmaster gave me another smile while adding, "He's never been too good at social obligations so I do my best to make sure he gets as many social interactions as I can manage to force on him." The old man sighed as Squall grumbled something incoherent before storming out of the room. Cid shook his head before turning his knowing ice blue eyes on me.

"I know he's fighting with his demons, but maybe an extra hand could help him," With a wink and a chuckle Cid turned around to shuffle back to his desk. I whistled to Angelo who immediately got back up from her comfortable spot on the floor to walk towards me. As I made my way to the exit Cid's soft voice caught my ears. "It wouldn't hurt to enroll in a few classes yourself. Maybe it will help you fake the Para-magic."

I turned to look at him slowly, his eyes raking over the numerous pale scars on the back of my biceps that trailed down onto my forearms and up onto my back. Cid winked again while placing his fingers to his lips. "Your secret is safe with me."

* * *

As I walked through the hall my heart was pounding in my chest. He really couldn't know just by looking at my arms could he? I mean, no one else had figured it out. Not the countless dress makers my father had hired or the boys who had come calling for my hand in marriage. Not even my father whose job was to _work_ with _her_.

 _She_ still hadn't found out that it was Caraway that had paid for the SeeD hit on _HER_ life.

I was distraught, visibly so if the worried looks from the students around me said anything at all. My eyes were focused on the ground as Angelo trotted beside me, the reassuring pitter-patter of her feet against the marble floor keeping me grounded as my mind wandered away. Unfortunately my faithful friend wasn't a seeing eye dog so I wasn't warned about the tall figure I ran straight into. I backed away a few steps, looking up into stormy blue eyes as Squall towered above me looking very imposing.

I muttered an apology before he sighed and turned away, walking in the direction of… I didn't even know.

"Hey!" I called out to him and he froze, turning slightly on his heel to raise an eyebrow at me again. I remember him being much more talkative while leaning over the bridge.

That wasn't a funny thought and I pushed it down, remembering the hurt, lost look in his eyes as I did my best to de-escalate the situation. It had almost worked up until he went to shake my hand and he fell.

"Yes?" He finally verbalized his annoyance and I wanted to shrink into myself, I wanted to take back my 'hey' and just let him continue walking. ' _Come on, you're better than that. You've had verbal smack downs with your father fifty times more intimidating than this_.' I took a breath before smiling, stepping forward.

"How are you feeling?" the question was so innocent and well meaning that I was surprised at the darkness that flooded his eyes and wasn't expecting the deadly tone of his voice.

"I'm fine," he growled, turning away from me in a fluid motion that spoke of years of practice and discipline.

Angelo growled at Squall's back as I stood there, motionless and staring.

"You don't have to be such a jerk," I muttered to myself.

* * *

I was lost, so very, hopelessly, lost. The sound of laughter from a nearby classroom alerted me to the fact that people were near and maybe my salvation was upon me. I silently prayed to any of the crystal gods I could think of as I entered the room as quietly as I could.

An interesting group of people were gathered in a mostly empty classroom.

A woman with gold for hair and an impeccably kept instructor's uniform was doing her best to keep a rowdy blond with an intricate face tattoo in check. Two brunettes, one with chestnut hair and the other with hair on the auburn spectrum were laughing as their classmate seemed to be reddening in the face. There were a few other students scattered in the classroom studying or simply watching the scene at the front of the class when Angelo let out a resounding bark, alerting everyone to our presence.

The girl with chestnut hair and sparkling green eyes perked up immediately as she jumped up and down, pulling on auburn boy's duster jacket.

"Irvy! It's a dog!" Her grin was infectious as she bounded towards us, making me feel very uneasy until she stopped a few feet away, her attention turning from Angelo to me. "Can I pet it?"

"Yeah," I answered quietly, then cleared my throat. "She loves affection."

"Yay!" The brunette jumped up and down before turning all of her attention to the dog. Everyone else, however, was staring directly at me. As I understood it, it's the middle of the semester and not a lot of new faces tend to pop up between one semester and another.

The instructor gave me a warm smile before walking towards me, the click-clack of her heels punctuating every step.

"It's nice to meet you, I'm instructor Trepe," She smiled a dazzling smile that made my own lips curl upwards.

"I'm Rinoa Heartilly," I said taking her hand in mine and then giving a short bow. If I remember correctly it was Balamb custom to bow to your superiors and I didn't want to make anyone _else_ mad at me.

"I remember you!" The blonde at the front of the class brought his hands up behind his head while crossing one of his feet in front of the other. "I'm Zell," he offered, deciding that his name was better than reminding me of last nights events. I decided I liked that and gave him a big smile.

"Thanks for the help," I said quietly. Everyone in the room began standing to come talk to me, the noise drowning out my words. Zell heard them though and gave me an almost imperceptive nod. I wonder what it was like to see your Commander in such a state. It was probably similar to that of a parent or even close friend.

"Names Irvine Kinneas," The auburn haired man wearing a cowboy hat tilted said hat as way of introduction. "And that little spit fire over there is Selphie." He sent her an affection look before turning back to me, his eyes sparkling. "She's my girl."

"Am not!" The girl called out without looking. I wasn't even sure how she heard him over all the noise as more students introduced themselves.

"So are you going to be signing up for classes?" One of the students asked.

"I haven't thought about it yet." I answered, shaking my head.

"You should, Instructor Trepe is the best instructor we have!" a tall boy with dark skin said with a deep voice.

"Now, now, settle down. Class is over, but remember to schedule for your Eidolon tests and make sure you have your buddies prepared. We'll be covering summoning tomorrow." Instructor Trepe sighed as the students began saying their goodbyes, leaving Irvine, Selphie, Zell and the Instructor herself.

"Sorry for interrupting classes. I was just kind of lost and was hoping someone could show me around." I spoke sheepishly as the group looked among themselves

"Squall didn't do it?" The instructor asked, bringing her hand up to her chin looking thoughtful.

"Quistis you know how he is sometimes," Irvine said after a moment. "Remember how long it took him to get use to me?"

"He's still not use to you," Zell coughed into his hand and Irvine shot him a heated look.

"You're one to talk!" Selphie stood up to defend the boy she was 'definitely not seeing.' With a huff she walked over to the small circle we had going, placing one hand on her hip and using the other to point at Zell accusingly. "He's known you the longest and he still can't stand spending more than ten minutes with you."

"Hey!" Zell yelped as Selphie stuck her finger into his collar bone, feigning being hurt. "Words hurt ya'know?"

"Oh PUH-lease." Selphie frowned at the boy, "You don't even know what feelings are!"

"Ouch," Irvine mumbled, shooting his friend a sympathetic look. I watched the scene unfold from what felt like the sidelines. I was there, but I wasn't. As Selphie and Zell bickered I could feel myself missing Zone and Watts. We had never been this rowdy, or even this close, but they were the first real friends I had.

I hadn't seen them in so long that it was difficult trying to imagine their faces.

"Am I interrupting?" The Commander's voice cut through the bickering more effectively than Quistis' attempts had. Everyone turned to face Squall, his hand on his hip and his eyebrow raised high. Angelo stood from her spot on the ground and walked towards me, feeling my nerves begin to bunch up at the way he was staring daggers at me. I gulped, but Zell stepped around me, blocking me from his gaze.

"Yeah, kinda." His voice was sheepish and there was a hint of a grin from what I could see of him. "You coming with us to lunch?"

"Not if you two are going to keep arguing," I could see his arms cross.

"Rinoa's gonna join us since you didn't show her around earlier," there was something weird in Quistis' voice, but I let it slide. I had just met these people, there was no need for me to begin making assumptions.

"Whatever," Squall and Quistis said the word in unison, which earned a chuckle from the rest of the group. I peeked around Zell to see him giving his steely gaze to the young instructor. She didn't seem to think anything of it and weathered the gaze with a small smile.

"Let's go get some grub!" Zell yelled jumping up and running from his protective spot in front of me to the door. Selphie took that as her cue to wrap her hand around the crook of my elbow and flash me a dazzling smile before gently tugging me forward.

Angelo followed behind the group keeping an eye on everything.

* * *

 **A/N;** yes, I know Eidolons aren't the proper summoning term for this game/universe but as much as I love GFs every single time I read it i see 'girl friend' instead of 'Guardian Force' so imma stick with Eidolons for rn. Most of this story is gonna flip flop from squall and Rinoa's pov. I don't think I'm going to keep it him then her than him, but for a little while that's gonna be the flow. I'm also really trying to work on keeping my chapters nice and long because tbh most of the chapters I write only take up three typed pages max. I'm working on it, and if you have any tips let me know! Also drop me a line some time and lemme know what you think about this thing! I can't promise there are gonna be regular updates since my schedule is as sporadic as I am but I will do my best to try and churn out the best quality I'm capable of!

I'm still learning and growing my style so this is gonna be an experience!


	3. Chapter 3

**Squall**

* * *

Lunch with these people was always… loud, though that word didn't seem to give the excess of noise justice. Even with the promise of bickering left behind Zell and Selphie still found a way to rile the other up. I was beginning to regret coming when my eyes fell on the Heartily girl, her deep brown eyes taking everything in as if it was new and fascinating.

I sighed, which caught Irvine's attention. His eyes followed mine and a grin spread across his face. He ignored my warning look as he leaned closer to the girl, all the charm of a womanizer bubbling up to the surface like he had never stopped.

"So what brings you to our lovely Garden," he raised an eyebrow and studied her face.

"I'm seeking asylum," she picked her cup up and brought it to her mouth to hide the hard line of her lips. As Irvine studied her Selphie cut in, giving a look that screamed 'back off.'

"Where are you from, Rinoa?" Selphie smiled as she linked her arm with the girl's.

"Born and raised in Deling City," her smile was back up as if it had never fell, but it didn't quite reach her eyes.

"We haven't been there in a while," Zell whistled, shooting a glance to me. I remembered the trip well, though I was trying my best to forget. It had been a failure, leading to our capture and the missiles that were launched out at Garden. We had barely escaped with our lives, and it was a true feat that we managed to save Balamb Garden at all. Tribia Garden had not fared well, and a lot of people lost their lives because of our failure.

My eyes fell to my food, half eaten but unappetizing. I wanted to go to my room and sleep. I wanted to be away from the loud group of people that seemed to thrive in my company while everyone else shied away, but instead of voicing my thoughts I slumped forward, leaning my face on my hand to support my head.

Rinoa blinked in my direction and my memory stirred again, trying to recall something that was shoved in the back of my head.

"So I heard a rumor that you helped our fearless Commander out last night, I hope he wasn't too much trouble." Rinoa paled at Irvine's words, but her smile was plastered on her face once again. I wonder if he noticed? Judging by his eyes traveling all over Selphie I highly doubted it.

"Oh, he was no trouble at all," Rinoa looked down at her food, her skin losing the rosy glow painted upon it only moments ago.

"Please, tell us how you managed to bump into him. He always seems to disappear before the night really begins," Quistis was studying me as Irvine asked another question. It was almost as if this interaction was planned. They always seem to be trying to get me to open up or at least take interest in some girl or project.

Now all their attention was focused on someone else and I had to admit I felt sorry for the girl.

She seemed taken aback by the question, her mouth opening but no words ready. Finally something seemed to click behind those honey brown orbs and she gave a small, sad smile.

"He was out by the bridge leading to Esthar, looking troubled." Her eyes raised from the table to connect with my gaze and an image of that same sad smile back lit with a starry sky floated across my mind. I blinked it away. Irrelevant.

I picked up my glass and raised it to my lips, wishing it was stronger than the cider rolling down my throat.

'Do you really need more alcohol after last night,' the silky voice that seemed to be the spokesman for my inner demons forced the thought upon me, making me go still. I couldn't even remember last night, not really.

As I tried to recall it I drew a blank, making my eyes furrow in annoyance.

Rinoa mistook this scowl at myself as one directed at her and she seemed to grow paler. I didn't correct her, however, in hopes that it would keep her away from me. Those honey brown eyes kept trying to stir something inside of me and I didn't appreciate it.

"I should get going soon," she drew her tongue over her lips as if they were dry and my eyes seemed drawn to the movement. "I have lots to explore and so many things to think about."

"Squall," Quistis' voice cut through my momentary lack of thought. I turned my scowl on her, hoping it would keep whatever she was going to say in her head. Unfortunately she simply smiled as my gaze fell on her. "Why don't you give our new resident a tour."

"And none of that directory bull you pulled with Selphie," Zell grinned wide and I had to stop myself from groaning outwardly.

They always expect so much of me. Can't I just sleep?

* * *

"I don't need anything special, if you don't want to do this you can go," her voice was soft and distant as we stood at the end of the walkway to the cafeteria. I wanted to take her up on her offer, but I knew for a fact that if I did Selphie and Quistis would never allow me a day's rest. They were persistent, vexing women and I was glad Quistis' eyes had finally found her someone other than me to occupy her slight crush.

Now I was left with a choice; I could take us left, but then I would have to walk all the way back to the dorm so I might get a few more hours of sleep before someone needs something again. Or I could take us right and end the tour in front of my desired current location. I shrugged and motioned for her to follow, only slightly annoyed that she hung back a few paces. I wasn't Irvine, I had no interest in flirting or making this 'tour' anymore uncomfortable than it strictly had to be.

I turned right and she kept pace, albeit a bit behind me. I stopped at the next walkway and she halted beside me, her eyes studying the color of the sign.

"This is the Quad. Selphie and the rest of what's left of the garden committee throw festivals here when they can manage. The next one will be coming up in a month or so." She nodded next to me and I continued forward to the next walkway.

"The infirmary, right?" Her voice perked up a little and I nodded. She simply nodded back and we continued to walk until the once proud entrance to garden loomed before us.

"This entrance is only used under special circumstances, and only if we're on land. It has to be guarded at all times due to fiends trying to sneak aboard." I then turned to the elevator. It should have been self explanatory but I sighed, deciding Quistis would probably chew my head off if I didn't do this tour correctly. "The classrooms and Cid's office are up through the elevator. You use to need special clearance but most everyone just barges in with some complaint or another."

"You don't seem to enjoy having the responsibility of leading everyone," I could feel her eyes on me, but I simply shook my head and kept walking, deciding it wasn't worth minding. She followed behind me, watching me too intently for my tastes.

As we passed students and instructors alike they saluted me, putting more emphasis on the fact that I was doomed to lead them all to an early grave.

I shoved the dark thought aside, stopping in front of the library, waiting for the girl to catch up.

"What's this one?"

"Library," was all I said, feeling that the word itself should be self explanatory. She sighed and walked passed me, her blue jacket tail trailing behind her. Her hands were clasped behind her back as she fidgeted with something in her grasp.

I rolled my eyes and continued walking the circle. We both stopped at the next walkway, her eyes intent on studying the floor.

"This ones the training center, the next is the garage, which is now more of an extra storage area and the last is the dorms."

"Thank you," her voice was soft as she continued staring at the floor, her honey eyes darker than they had been at lunch.

"If you need anything I'm sure one of my acquaintances will be around soon to make sure I did my job." She nodded and I paused, wanting to add something else, but my brain was drawing a blank. Was there something I was missing? It's not a big Garden so it's not like she can get lost. Plus she's not even taking classes anyway.

"Squ- Commander," she turned to me, concern evident in those big brown eyes. "If you ever feel like you did last night again…. Don't hesitate to find me." She swallowed something down before walking towards the library. I watched as she walked away, confusion setting into my face.

I was starting to worry that I had done something worse than attempt to cut myself last night and that poor girl witnessed it.

I seethed at myself, angry that my vulnerability had been shown to a stranger. She didn't look back as she walked. For a moment I thought about calling out to her and asking about what it was I couldn't remember.

My anger boiled into rage as I decided that hitting things would be better use of my time than sleeping.

* * *

 **Irvine**

* * *

He was doing a terrible job. The girl walked away from Squall without so much as a backward glance and the young commander had done nothing to stop it.

"Are you sure we should keep trying to set him up? What if he doesn't even like girls?" Selphie's voice filled his head and Irvine laughed.

"You saw the way he was looking at her over lunch." He wagged his eyebrows and Selphie did her best to stifle the laugh bubbling up in her throat. He had been trying for ages to get close to the brunette beauty in front of him, and nothing seemed to get her to push up against him more than spying on Squall and making plans in secret.

"I've seen him look at you like that," she pointed out. He scowled at her, deciding now wasn't the time to argue semantics.

"All he needs is a nudge," He stood up, no longer needing to hide behind a plant as neither of the two they were following seemed to notice much about their surroundings. Squall made his way to the training center while Rinoa walked slowly towards the library.

"That room across from Squall is still empty, right?" An idea hit Irvine much like on of his beauty's punches as a nefarious smile tugged at the ed edge of his lips.

"Yes," Selphie said, her own smile not nearly as subdued as her brain stopped at the same conclusion.

"Not anymore."

* * *

 **Squall**

* * *

My muscles were sore after training as best I could. Our fiends weren't breeding like they use to, making it harder to find any at all in the small faux jungle. It was probably due to the movement of the Garden or low nearby human population.

Another thing I would need to take care of.

I sighed as I stepped into the dorms building, following the winding hallway until I reached my room. It was nestled in a corner so far back students use to groan and complain because of the distance between their room and their classes, back when they use to have enough students to fill the large building. Now there were barely enough to fill over half the rooms.

It was a nice quiet place to be, and it made me feel a little better that no one can hear me when my demons reared their ugly heads and I would scream out in frustration or anger.

I refuse to cry though. Nothing is worth the weakness of tears. Tears are for children, and there's no room for childish notions in the life of a SeeD, and certainly not in someone who was supposedly 'in charge' like Cid seemed to want to constantly remind me.

The door to the room across from mine was open and a familiar dog was laying on the bed. As I tried to place where I've seen it before the dogs owner stepped towards the bed and I froze, anger boiling under the surface.

This was another one of 'the gang's' attempts to force me to 'make friends.' Well, I wasn't having it. I needed my privacy at night if they let me have nothing else.

My anger took hold of me, forcing my legs forward as the Heartily girl stood up, wiping tears from her face. She turned to look at me slowly, her sad expression changed to one of fear.

I wasn't sure what I was going to do before, but as all of the anger deflated out of me the only thing I wanted to do was comfort her. It was a strange feeling, one usually reserved for young children or occasionally Selphie when her festival plans went askew. I have only acted on this desire once, and I couldn't help but feel like just this once I could change that. I just didn't have the words. We stood there in silence for a long moment before she gave a sad smile, tears still falling from her eyes.

She left silently, leaving me to stare at the wall, at a loss for words.

* * *

 **Rinoa**

* * *

This had to be someone's cruel form of a joke. Not a single room was occupied in the back of this dorms, but still Selphie had moved forward, leading me to one nestled in the very back. It was one of the larger rooms with a big window and its own small bathroom.

The view was beautiful as the garden sailed through the water. Nothing but sparkling blue for as far as the eyes could see.

Once Selphie left I began to truly miss Zone and Watts. They had loved the ocean and a few times they had entertained the thought of running out of Timber and simply sailing the open sea. We would laugh the thought away, but it kept resurfacing. Their eyes would sparkle, making up tails of adventure in the big blue abyss. I hadn't thought about them this much since my first few weeks back in my father's house. I wonder how much trouble they got into? Are they okay?

Did they ever get their chance to sail the open waters?

My mind trailed off to my father. Unbridled rage swam through my veins in an instant at the thought of him. His cruel behavior and tyrannical ways. No wonder he was working with _her._ Ever since mom died he's been nothing but a horrible father.

And then I was thinking about my mother. My hand went to the thin chain around my neck and rested firmly on the unadorned ring that sat comfortably between my collar bones. It had been my grandmother's wedding band, which was past down to my mother. And now to me, though I highly doubted I would ever wed. No, I would die long before that.

Tears began collecting behind my eye lids, but I did my best to push them away. I needed to be strong. She needed me to be strong.

Angelo whined from her spot on my bed, feeling the emotions inside of me becoming too much. If I didn't get a handle on things I would be in a lot of trouble.

I was starting to wonder if it was really a good idea to be here, surrounded by SeeDs whose only real goal was to keep the world safe from what I am.

From what I was made into.

I leaned down, giving Angelo all the affection I could muster while the tears finally became too much.

Footsteps alerted me to the fact that I was no longer alone and I stood, wiping a few tears away from my face. I expected to see Selphie or Zell. Maybe even Quistis.

Instead my eyes fell on Squall, anger obvious on his face. What was I to do? I know he doesn't want to talk to me. As far as I can tell he doesn't even remember falling off the bridge. He almost hit the water!

If it wasn't for what I am then he would be dead, but if he found out about the truth than I would be the one meeting a water grave.

SeeDs don't get along with Sorceresses. Me being his least favorite person in the world probably wouldn't help me out any when it comes down to it.

I couldn't stand here anymore, waiting for him to say something in that voice void of nothing more than sarcasm. I gave him a small smile before slipping away, doing my best to be as quiet as possible.

My mind drifted to the thought that had plagued me since the day I realized what had happened. Why, of all the candidates for this wretched curse, had a Sorceress' power been flung upon my head?

It was still a mystery as to how a Sorceress' successor was chosen mere seconds before death. Sometimes it fell upon an unsuspecting victim halfway across the world, others it was someone right in front of the dying thing, power pouring out of her veins much like blood.

And it was always a her, always a female. And they almost always rose to some form of power.

I pulled my arm warmer away, studying the pencil thin scars that stopped just above my wrist as my tears began to slow. The mark of my power were the wings which seemed to force themselves from within me, dragging from my skin. To anyone else these scars were almost invisible, making no discernible pattern whatsoever. I could see the light etchings of feathers, each individual one branding into my skin in almost invisible lines.

Sorceresses were feared due to the fact that they could sway hearts and minds with a single look, control other's deeds like puppets if that's what they desired. I am new to my gifts, not sure what I can really do. I always feel the pinprick of these feather-like scars whenever my power is lost beyond my control, the wings inside of me forcing their way out, painful but beautiful. I froze for a moment, taking in the sight of the water from a small window.

Another ghostly thought crossed my mind as I forced myself to move, turning another corner and letting my feet drag me through the maze of hallways and passed shut doors.

What if Squall couldn't remember because I hadn't _wanted_ him to remember?


	4. Chapter 4

**Rinoa**

* * *

Three days of barely sleeping was starting to get to me. I wonder if Squall's friends know he screams out in his sleep, or that he paces the halls in the middle of the night. He seems so adverse to talking to them I wonder if they even are his friends in his head. He seems all alone, and I've never wanted to help someone so bad in my life.

Unfortunately he seems to dislike me more than everyone else and I can't help but feel like it's unwarranted. All I've tried to do is help since I've gotten here!

Selphie brought me back from my thoughts as she tapped me on my shoulder and bounced around me, her green eyes filled with mischief.

"So are you going tonight?"

"Going to what?" I perked up a little bit. Selphie's smile broadened as she fiddled with her fingers.

"They're throwing a SeeD ball tonight to commentate a whole year under our fearless leader's guidance." Selphie spun on her toes and walked in front of me, every step full of more pep than I could muster in my tired state.

"I didn't bring anything to wear," I sighed, sagging my shoulders.

"We're the same size, you can wear something of mine. Besides, all the SeeDs have to wear their uniforms or else we get sent to the disciplinary committee." Selphie turned around and began walking backwards, making a weird scrunched face as she did. I laughed as she almost tripped over a bench. We walked together for a while, going no where in particular when we stopped by the training center. It was still pretty early so most students were in class, but a group of two very loud boys and a silent, angry looking middle man left the hall and began walking toward us. They were all covered in scratches and the only one wearing a shirt was the middle one. Though it certainly wasn't a shirt any more.

"Irvine what did you do!" Selphie sounded both worried and reprimanding as she approached her 'not-boyfriend'. He grinned at her and flexed his biceps, wagging his eyebrows.

"Like what you see Heartily?" Zell asked as I pried my eyes away from the exposed flesh of his chest. Both of his shoulders were covered in that same scrolling sharp tattoo that adorned his face with the emblem of Balamb Garden over his heart.

"Leave her alone," Squall gave a gruff reprimand and Zell's smile grew wider as my eyes flitted over to Squall. His white tank top was stained green and black, the color of monster blood depending on the variation, and it was in tatters. Lightly tanned skin was visible through the rips, as were multiple scratches and a few scars.

"Let's leave the idiots alone," Selphie linked her arm with mine and began dragging me towards the cafeteria. "We've got people to do and things to see."

Irvine seemed upset with her phrasing as she tugged me along. He muttered indecent things until we were out of earshot as he began stomping to the dorms. We could have taken the same route, but Selphie stopped in front of the directory before making a decision.

"Let's stop by Quisty's class," she grinned mischievously before pulling me up the stairs and pushing the button for the elevator.

"What are you doing?" Squall's voice was toneless as he walked up to us. I forced my eyes forward, making sure I wouldn't be caught staring again.

"We're gonna visit Quistis." Selphie smiled innocently as she leaned around me to look Squall in the eye.

"She's in the middle of class." Squall shot her a warning glance as the elevator chimed. It open noiselessly and I stepped inside, dragging Selphie with me. Squall sighed and took a step inward before the doors had time to shut. For a school housing so many students the elevator wasn't very large. Maybe it would be able to fit six people comfortably.

As I wondered if there were any stairs connecting the first and second floors Selphie began humming and Squall sighed once again.

"We're being called out soon. Cid wants us to check on Timber. You should be training Selphie."

"Do we get to ride one of the trains?" Selphie's eyes lit up and I laughed. Squall shot me a glance but I ignored it, instead turning my focus to Selphie.

"Do you get to ride the trains often?" I asked as the elevator chimed again and opened on the second floor. Selphie pulled me out to the walkway, both of her hands gripping into my forearm as she practically dragged me ahead.

"Not as much as we use to!" She sounded wistful as she let me go and spun around in front of me. "The Garden makes travel a lot cheaper but it also means we don't get to ride trains too often."

"That's no fun. You know, I use to live on a train, back when I was a member of a resistance group."

"What was it like!" Selphie's eyes were twinkling now as I told her everything I could. From the extremely pink color of my room to my two friends now lost in memory. Selphie kept leading me forward, only interjecting to ask more questions.

By the time we reached the classroom Selphie was in a very energetic mood.

"Squall, wouldn't it be sooooo cool to live on a train?" I froze as Selphie's eyes focused on something behind me. I looked over my shoulder to see him leaning against a wall a couple yards away, looking part thoughtful, but mostly amused. Did he listen to my whole story?

"It would be a lot like living in a giant metal box that moves." He shrugged, his steely eyes seemed distant, as if truly pondering the question. He gave a slight frown after a moment, making me think he didn't enjoy the idea too much.

"I think it would be amazing!" Selphie stuck her tongue out at her Commander then slipped into the classroom, leaving me alone. Well, not completely alone.

"That one will get you into trouble," Squall's warning tone reached me and as if I was in a daze I turned slowly to look at him.

"You should really get those injuries healed up," I said, eyeing a rather nasty looking cut that ran up his forearm.

"Too much trouble," he shook his head, standing up to leave.

"Then let me do it." I sighed, walking over to him with cautious steps. He shrugged and leaned back against the wall. His eyes now regarding me with interest rather than polite distaste.

I sighed, my fingers very gently reaching out to touch his arm. Using my natural gifts to heal would get me caught in a heartbeat, but luckily for me I managed to get a hold of one of my father's old junction accessories.

They hold stored magic drawn from enemies and help you summon eidolons in your possession.

I pushed down the primal urge to use my natural magic, and instead focused on the magic stored within the feat of science attached to my belt. It was almost as easy as breathing as the soft green light of a healing spell pushed its way from my fingers and began knitting the skin on Squall's arm together.

He let out a soft gasp, almost like a pleased sigh, before standing up straighter and studying my face.

"You should train to become a SeeD. We could use more healers with a gift like yours." He grunted out, words low and gravely. I nodded before stepping back, letting my fingers fall from the skin of his arm to rest at my sides.

"Maybe if I join I'll make some friends."

"Selphie's already attached herself to you, the others will come quickly." He sighed as if talking this much pained him and he pushed himself away from the wall, taking even steps back towards the elevator.

I turned back towards the classroom, deciding it would be best to just leave him alone.

* * *

Quistis' class was more interesting than anything my tutors had ever attempted. There were a lot of note takers, but just as many students with eager questions and extra facts to add to the discussion. And it was an actual discussion. Not the kind my father attempts to have where I'm not to speak at all and am simply there to absorb.

Selphie was sitting on a chair, incorrectly, at the back of the class, with her feet firmly planted where her but should have been and said but planted on the back. I shook my head at her as she blurted out wrong answers and made silly comments that would make the kids snort out laughing. She was, at least, easily entertained.

When Quistis finally bent to her will and let her students out for lunch ten minutes early Selphie shouted out a triumphant 'BOO-YAKA!" before running up to the front of the class to harass her friend some more. The blond instructor crossed her arms and did her best to hide the smile forming on the corner of her lips.

"I don't see why not," Quistis said thoughtfully as I made my way up to the front where the two girls were talking animatedly.

"It's gonna be the best night ever! Maybe he'll even dance!"

"Oh I doubt that." Quistis shook her head before giving me a warm, inviting smile. "It's nice to see you're settling in and even keeping an eye on our resident trouble maker."

"I am not Zell, I do not need to be looked after," Selphie pouted before turning to me. "Quisty agreed to help with your hair!" The mischievous brunette gave me a dazzling smile that I couldn't help but return. "Buuuuuttttt~" she drug out the word with a slight lilt in her voice, "you have to agree to a condition. A dare really."

"Sounds dangerous," I blinked, looking from one girl to the other. Selphie shrugged.

"It very well could be." She began nodding sagely with her eyes shut before opening one emerald eye to peer at me. "You've got to get Squall to dance."

"Is it even possible?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. "Why don't I just ask Irvine to dance?" I poked fun at her. I've never seen a girl sputter so indignantly while her face turned red so I couldn't help the laughter that bubbled up in my throat.

"Leave the poor dear alone." Quistis giggled as well, covering her face daintily with her hand.

"I won't make any promises," I finally stopped giggling enough to shoot Selphie what I hoped was a serious look. "But I'll do my best."

"Awesome!" Selphie fist pumped the air before standing up straight and smoothing down her yellow over-all dress. "Party starts at eight so meet in my room at 6." Selphie looked at Quistis, who simply nodded. "For now, let's get some food!"

* * *

 **Squall**

* * *

I wasn't sure why I followed them off the elevator. I was suppose to visit Headmaster Cid with a 'wild life' report, but something in the way Selphie was trying to pull her new friend away so quickly piqued my interest. I was expecting talk of Irvine or any of the other men roaming around the campus.

Instead Rinoa spoke passionately about the things in her life that she truly missed. It was interesting, hearing her tell her story.

But she was an even better healer. I looked down at my arm, once riddled with scars both made by my hand and received from fights. She erased any proof that I have ever brought a blade to myself. At least, on that arm.

I clenched my fist as the elevator chimed and it stopped on the third floor. Cid was sitting in the waiting room in front of his office, listening intently to Nida's report on current trajectory and his estimation on when we'll make it to Timber. When the two noticed my arrival Nida saluted and quietly retreated to the headmaster's office so that he could keep an eye on the Garden's path.

"Ah, Squall, how fares the hunt?" The old man asked, his eyes crinkling in the corners as his lips tugged up into a smile.

"Monster counts are down." I sighed, placing a hand on my shoulder.

"We'll have to send a team out to catch some new breeds while we're stopped by Dollet."

"I thought we were going to Timber, sir?" I raised an eyebrow and he chuckled.

"You are, yes, but it's close to mid-semester break and the children will be getting off at Balamb the next day. We had to make a compromise."

"Very well." ' _At least Selphie will get to ride one of the trains.'_

"I want you to take the Heartily girl with you. She gave me a demonstration of her Para-magic abilities yesterday and I'm convinced she'll make an excellent addition to your team."

"At least numbers will even out again," Zell commented once he stepped off the elevator. I inwardly groaned before turning to glare at him. He made a show of being wounded, then his usual shit eating grin plastered itself on his face as he leaned against a wall like he belonged here.

"You're sure about this?" I turned back to Cid, giving him a weathering look as he simply clasped his hands behind his back, his smile never leaving his face.

"I couldn't imagine a place she would be safer, and she did ask for a bodyguard."

"I'll do it," Zell stood up straighter without his back leaving the wall.

"Your call, Commander," Cid leaned against his secretary's desk looking over his appointments for the rest of day, acting as if he didn't care about my decision.

"You get one chance," I glared at him, and he looked mollified for a moment, before giving me a smaller grin, but certainly more triumphant.

"You won't regret this!" Zell jumped up and pressed the call button for the elevator. He gave me a half-assed salute before stepping inside.

"You sure about this?" Cod asked, a little nervously.

"Sure," was all I said. 'Besides, it's not like I won't be right there the entire time. He won't have a chance to screw up.'


	5. Chapter 5

**Rinoa**

* * *

Growing up in the large estate of an esteemed general, with people only attempting to get close to me due to my father's fortune left me very little time as a child to make friends, or even really learn how. Sure he had maids but they were all older than I was and had no choice but to do as I asked. They weren't there to spend time with me because they wanted it and that had made me lonely.

I was a little surprised I even had the social skills to function in a real world environment, but I guess most of the credit could go to Selphie for the way she drags stories or conversations out of a person. She even got Squall to add sentences to a conversation at lunch. For someone who likes to be alone and push people away he always sits with the loudest group of people in the cafeteria.

When Quistis had caught my questioning looks at their leader she stifled a laugh and whispered to me, 'He learned after a couple weeks that if he doesn't willingly sit with us Selphie will make him suffer.' I couldn't help but laugh every time I caught his gaze as he looked longingly at the table in a far corner, secluded and away from his loud team mates. I even had to excuse myself early from lunch on the grounds of wanting to 'train before the ball.' Zell thought it was a great idea and wanted to come with me but Irvine decided he needed some sort of help getting ready tonight.

Honestly, it was only two o'clock. What kind of preparations would he need to get ready this early in the day? I shook my head at the thought and continued to the training center. Originally I was just going to get some fresh air, but stocking up on curing spells from a monster could be a good exercise. I didn't bring my weapon with me, but I had enough attack-type spells in my arsenal to do the job.

The inside was like a jungle, complete with the faint sound of monsters and teenagers sneaking away from class to meet up 'discretely.' I may only be Nineteen, but I almost felt like I was older than these kids. Even though it was only a few years it felt like decades. I know the feeling wasn't justified, but living what I've lived could have changed me for the worst. After all, I could be like _her._ The evil manipulative woman trying to wage war against the entire world. I forced the thought aside as Angelo met me in the center of the training area, her eyes knowing and bright.

"You ready for a little run?" I asked her, as a smile spread to my face. She barked once before leading me into the area designated 'Danger; Real monster are loose.' I guess it was an obligatory sign for freshman or visitors. At least they were warning people. The inside had denser trees and even a few streams and a small pond. It was a beautiful area and I could feel life thrumming through this place. There wasn't much monster life left but I could feel all the people who had poured hours of training into the area, leaving small pockets of energy behind.

Squall was all over this place. I could feel his anger and hatred, but they were abstract feelings with nothing else tied to them. I wouldn't know who these feelings were focused on unless I delved into his head, and that was something I had promised myself I wouldn't do. I'm still upset that I may have accidentally erased Squall's memories of the bridge.

As I was lost in thought a Grat took the opportunity to get the drop on me, running out of the underbrush. Angelo gave off one warning bark before dropping into a defensive stance in front of me. I focused on the fire spells located inside of my junction accessory. It had originally been a regular fire spell but even junction magic cast by me becomes stronger than it naturally was before. It was a small annoyance and normally ended with my opponent dead before I could draw any more magic from it. On impact the monster seemed to wither into itself.

"Impressive," Squall grunted out behind me and I resisted the urge to squeal. Instead I went for my usual tactic of mock flirting and evasion.

"Are you stalking me now?" I asked, turning around slowly and plastering a fake smile on my face. He frowned at me before sighing.

"I didn't get the chance to tell you at lunch that the Headmaster wants you to join us on our trip to Timber. He said you gave him a demonstration of your magic and I wanted one as well."

"You already saw me heal you," I narrowed my eyes at him, trying to see if his words were a bluff or not. I would remember giving the Headmaster a demonstration. In fact I've been purposely avoiding him every chance I could. I'm scared he knows my secret and I don't want to get on his bad side in case he decides to sic his well trained and fairly handsome SeeDs on me.

"That wasn't in a stressful environment."

"You've obviously never spent time with yourself." The retort was out of my mouth before I realized it, and before I could take it back the deafening roar of a T-rexaur shattered what silence hung in the air. Squall spun around as Angelo jumped in between the beast and I.

"Stay out of the way," Squall warned, but I ignored him, immediately drawing as much cure magic as I could. Squall pulled the blade that had been attached to his side since the first time I ran into him today, but only now did I notice what it was. Gun-blades are difficult to master and yet Squall looked so at ease with it in his hands, almost as if it was an extension of himself. Unfortunately I didn't have time to stare at the hunk as the monster let out another deafening roar and began charging towards us.

The giant lizard managed to get a claw in Squall before the SeeD could move out of the way. Unfortunately that seemed to only aggravate the man further as he lashed out with his weapon, slashing into the T-rexaur with precision and lobbing off the hand digging into his arm. I drew out a couple more cure spells to keep myself stocked up before giving the actual battle my attention. Squall was wounded, but would live for the moment so I focused on the monster's weakness, ice magic. I took a deep breath as Angelo charged towards the beast and attached herself to it's hind leg, causing it to roar out in pain. Squall yelled again for me to get away but I didn't listen, instead I focused on the magic stored in the accessory at my hip before launching large shards of ice at the monster, stabbing it through the neck and puncturing it's throat and heart.

A weak roar left it's throat in a bloody gurgle as it swung around and smacked Squall in the chest. He let out and 'oomph' noise and I could _feel_ his internal injuries. A cure spell was on my fingers before I could really think about it and I could feel my natural powers enhance it enough to probably cure him of everything except that scar on his face. The light engulfing Squall was blinding, but he fought through it, shoving the ice spike in the fiend's chest deeper and destroying the thing's heart. It fell in a heap of dead weight to its side as Angelo padded her way to me quietly, giving me a very judgmental look. I ignored her in favor of the man looking over his arms. He was wearing a nice clean shirt when he walked in here but it was back to being covered with black blood and tears.

His back was to me and I froze as my eyes took in what looked like whip marks deep in his skin. My magic was good, but even I couldn't heal things like old scars and these were very old. I kept my breathing even as he turned to me, looking one part annoyed and two parts amazed.

"How did you get to be such a strong healer?" He asked, a little confused, his voice demanding an answer.

"When I was younger I didn't have any friends so I… I would play in the woods by my house and use my dad's high tech military equipment to draw magic like I had seen my father do a million times. I just… I kept doing it until I got good." We looked at each other for a long time before the frown that seemed permanently etched into his face became a small grin.

"Why," he asked after a moment and I could feel heat raising to my cheeks. It was a really stupid reason, and I had known it then just like I do now.

"I thought if I could cast magic like my dad people would like me. They always seemed to like him because he was so good at strategizing and making plans for parties or showing off the… The Sorceress." I was expecting some kind of outrage when mentioning my own father's involvement with their sworn enemy. Instead Squall's smile fell a little and he almost looked sorry for me.

"You said your father was Caraway, correct?" I nodded. "We ran into him a while back. His strategies are good, but full of easy holes. Your talent with Para-magic is not." The smile was back, and in full force for a moment. It was a wonderful look on him, but it was gone the second Selphie's voice began calling my name throughout the training center. A grimace took over his features as if he could imagine all of the conversations she was going to force him into.

"If you run now she won't see you," I offered and he gave me a grateful look before dashing into the nearby bushes. With his shirt stained black he was practically camouflaged. I began walking toward Selphie's voice, creating a good bit of distance between Squall's hiding place and where she eventually found me.

"You ran off so quick I forgot to ask you to come to my room early so we can pick you out a dress," Selphie frowned at me.

"You know, If I was still training I'd be upset that you frightened away all of the prey with your loud shrill voice." I teased her as I began steering her towards the exit.

"Hmph," she pouted, crossing her arms together. It wasn't until we were on the walkway leaving the training center that she finally spoke to me again. "Have you seen Squall, he ran off shortly after you did."

"Nope." I shook my head as we continued walking. I took a second to concentrate on the energies around me, trying to figure out if he was nearby or not. Selphie would accuse me of lying if he walked out of the training center so soon after we did. I mean, it was a decently sized place but if I would have been there longer there would have been no way I could get away with the lie. Fortunately he wasn't around so I shot her a smile.

"What," she narrowed her eyes at me as I looped my arm with hers.

"So, what do you think Irvine is doing before the party?" I asked as innocently as I could and she scowled at me.

"Probably flirting with some freshman that's too young for him. " She sounded dejected and I almost felt bad for her.

"You know, I'm sure if you settled down and decided to go steady with him he wouldn't do things like that." She sighed and looked over at me.

"That's one possibility. The other is I go out with him, get attached to him, and then get hurt when he cheats on me."

"If you're feeling this hurt over the mere possibility of him flirting with a girl I can promise you that you're already attached. Why not just give it a chance. At this rate you're going to get hurt either way."

"You're right," She sighed as we began walking to the dorms. Angelo padded behind us quietly until we got closer to my room. She ran ahead with a few happy barks to punctuate that she was ready to lie down for a bit.

"She already knows where your room is," Selphie sounded genuinely amazed.

"She likes having her own space. We traveled alone for a long time and she didn't exactly have a place with a warm bed most of the time."

"How old is she?" Selphie tilted her head as I used my key-card to get into my room. Angelo padded her way to the makeshift bed of blankets in the corner and made herself comfortable. I filled her food and water up as I pondered the question.

"Close to eleven years old," I frowned. "I got her when I was eight as a birthday present."

"She's getting old, you sure you should be bringing her into battles with you?" Selphie looked worried and for the first time since I left my father's home I could see how tired my dog was after two fights. She was breathing heavy but her dark eyes regarding me with a warning. ' _leave me behind and you'll regret it'_

"Probably not, She's stubborn though and would probably get upset with me if I didn't take her with me." I leaned down and ran my hand through her pelt. It was as thick as always, but I could feel the years of her defending me in battle weighing on her body. Even though she's always been fed properly there was a thinness hidden underneath her fur and suddenly I wasn't so sure about letting her leave my room for anything heavier than walks.

"You've had her for a long time, huh?" Selphie gave me a sad look and I nodded.

"For a while she was my only friend." I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes and Angelo let out a soft whimper, feeling my pain. Selphie stood and walked slowly to us, watching the dog carefully. A sad smile spread across the brunette's face as she made her way down to the floor so that she was eye-level with my dog.

"It's okay girl. Rinoa's not gonna be alone anymore." Selphie gave her a smile as she pet Angelo's head gently. "I'll take good care of her if we get into any trouble, I promise." Selphie's words were soft as she cooed to my dog and Angelo seemed to accept her words as she laid her head down and closed her eyes to sleep.

"I never noticed how tired she is after a fight." I couldn't hold the tears back anymore and Selphie shot me an apologetic look.

"She'll be okay. She's still got a few years left in her." Selphie grinned and stood up, holding her hand out to help me do the same. I kissed Angelo's head before I stood, taking Selphie's hand as she yanked me to my feet and began dragging me away. "She needs to rest up a bit so let's go to my room." I nodded, but shot one last worried glance at my dog who simply lifted her head and huffed at me in aggravation.

* * *

We spent the hours waiting on Quistis going through Selphie's closet of like a million dresses to finally find one that was almost perfect. It was a light cream color and it hit mid-thigh but Selphie didn't have any shoes to go with it. I almost wished that for the first time I could go back home and raid my closet of expensive designer dresses and shoes. I've never been more excited to go to a formal event and yet… even that wasn't enough to make me want to actually go through with it. Nothing was worth getting locked inside that house again.

"I'm sure Quistis has some shoes to match." Selphie said a bit dreamily as she scribbled in a notebook. Once she was done she carefully tucked it underneath her mattress and swore me to secrecy so Irvine would never find it. "Wanna play cards?" She grinned at me as she pulled out a deck of Triple Triad cards.

"I've never played before," I nibbled on my bottom lip and Selphie gave me a devilish grin.

"I'll teach you."

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Irvine waltzed into the room unannounced, without so much as a warning knock, followed by Zell who was looking bored. "She cheats and plays by her own rules."

"Do not!" Selphie frowned as Irvine made himself at home on the plush bean bag chair in the corner leaving Zell to lean against a wall.

"Don't let her fool you," Zell leaned a little closer to me to whisper while Selphie and Irvine continued their argument. "She's a great friend but she hates losing at card games and she's known for hiding cards in her dress."

"He's telling lies!" Selphie turned and Zell's face met a pillow at top speed. " And you!" She pointed at Irvine before throwing a stuffed animal with a rather hard looking face directly at him. "You do not barge into a ladies room! I could have been naked!"

"All the more reason to do it in my opinion," Irvine gave her a wolfish grin and the light sprinkle of blush that was once coating her cheeks spread to engulf her face in a cherry red color.

"Quit baiting her attacks just cause you're a glutton for punishment. I don't wanna haf'ta bury you in the quad," Zell slurred his words together before turning to me. "While those two kill each other how about I teach you how to play? I'm not as good as Squall, but that's mostly because he has like a million cards."

"Squall plays?" I asked as my eyebrows almost lifted into my hairline.

"Sure does. Every time we stop in Dollet he challenges the pub owner. He even beat the mayor of Fisherman's Horizon once. It was almost heartbreaking watching the old man lose his favorite card." Zell laughed at himself as he gently pulled the Triple Triad cards from Selphie's hand so she wouldn't assault Irvine with them. Zell sat cross legged on the floor and motioned for me to follow him down. I watched as he sorted through the deck to create two hands and he passed me one of them.

"So what do we do first?" I asked, looking over my cards. There were three numbers written on the top corner of each card with monsters carefully stenciled onto the cardstock.

"Heads or tails?" Zell asked as he repeatedly flipped a coin and then caught it in mid-air just to repeat the cycle.

"Tails."

"Heads," Zell grinned and pointed to the floor. "I didn't bring my mat with me, but pretend there are nine spaces, three in each row and column."

"But we have ten cards between us," I frowned. He nodded sagely before pulling a card from his hand.

"I go first and then it's your turn and so on and so forth. In the end all my cards are gonna end up on the board but you'll still have one. First person gets to pick the first space, second person gets to retain one card point every game."

"Oh," I nodded and he set his card down, facing me so I could see the numbers.

"We're gonna call this the top let corner. Now, each card has four numbers, your job is to keep your number on the displayed sides higher than your opponents. See, right here on the bottom I have a one, so anything higher than that will flip my card, but on the right I have a three so you'll need a four or more."

"Oh, I thought that was three numbers," I frowned at my cards and then looked back at the floor. "My turn right?"

"Yeah," Zell watched me patiently as I looked through my small hand to find a card with decent enough numbers to flip his card be still have high numbers facing outward. When I finally set my car down he grinned and stood up, going through Selphie's desk like he'd done it a million times, when he sat back down he held two baggies of what looked like poker chips. One bag red, the other blue. "Pick a color." My hand automatically reached for the blue and he instructed me to put a chip on both cards.

"So this is how you keep track of who owns the card?" I asked once my chips were in place.

"Yeah, it makes it easier." And so we began to play. Zell would give out helpful hints and tips while we went and before I knew it we had played three games and I had won two of them.

"She's getting good." Irvine commented.

"It's all in the cards baby. With the right cards you can beat anyone." Zell grinned as he went through Selphie's deck and began reorganizing them.

"It sure is crowded in here today." Quistis walked into the room and sighed, Selphie and Irvine were perched on Selphie's bed, a foot of space between them, while Zell and I took up the floor. I was stretched out on my stomach while he was leaning against the wall, looking through Selphie's cards to find some higher numbers.

"Class took forever!"

"No, I had other things I had to do, like get the Garden ready for ships to dock." Quistis rubbed the bridge of her nose, letting me know she's told Selphie this a few times. "You boys need to get ready, I'm sure Squall will need help with the greeting even though lord knows he won't ask for it." Quistis sighed as the boys straightened up and said their goodbyes.

Once we were alone Quistis' eyes fell on the dress hanging on Selphie's mirror. "Is that what you're going to wear Rinoa?" Quistis turned her gaze on me and I nodded.

"We were actually wondering if you had any shoes to match it."

"I'm sure we can find something," Quistis grinned before checking the clock on wall. Three hours till eight and my nerves were starting to bunch up.

* * *

 **A/N** this wasn't meant to be this long but I'm a sucker for group bonding. Plus Zell teaching Rinoa a skill that could help her get closer to Squall? always important. I always kind of felt like Zell would be a pretty good big brother figure to Rinoa and that's what I'm going to try to portray. Let me know what you think about it!

and yes, I know T-rexaurs don't carry cure magic but I didn't want Rinoa to leave empty handed!


	6. Chapter 6

**Squall**

* * *

I had stared at my chest and arms for hours after Rinoa had healed me, looking for any trace of the scars I had left on myself the past year and a half since my depression began making my brain imagine awful, terrible things. The pain makes the images go away, and for some reason drinking makes it worse.

And yet I can't seem to stop myself from reaching for the alcohol because it make socializing easier. Zell and Irvine were taking care of the greeting process at the moment as ships full of dignitaries and important generals and SeeDs dispatched from all over the world came to celebrate… me. I snorted at my reflection in the mirror, taking in the dark circles under my eyes and the ugly scar stretching between steel-like orbs. My chest was bare of almost all of the scars I had received in my ten years of attending Garden. All that were left were scars received before I turned ten, (even if I tried I wouldn't be able to remember how I received them) and the ones from my days being tortured after the assassination attempt went awry just a little over a year or so ago.

I decided not to think about that as I slipped my jacket on and made sure my belt was securely fastened. Cid wants me to wear my medals, flashy pieces of ore used as gifts to show what a wonderful Commander I've been. And yet all I've done is lead people to their deaths with my orders.

I shuddered as I thought about leaving the damned things in their box to rot. They were too heavy, couldn't Cid see that? The weight of lives hanging on my jacket lapel like the sacrifices made were simple and small, like the shiny buttons I 'won.' Like children and adults and people with entire lifetimes ahead of themselves didn't fall because of my orders. My hands shook as I fastened each button to its spot. I couldn't wear these things like trophies, but I could wear them as my shame. To show my failures. Each button signifying tens to hundreds, maybe even thousands, of lives lost because of this war. Because of Edea's lust for power.

As careful and thoughtless as I could I began lacing my boots onto my feet and attempting to comb my hair into something more subdued, but my bangs simply wouldn't lay back. I suppressed a sigh as I looked over my appearance once more. The only thing I was missing was enough alcohol to get me through Cid's speech.

* * *

 **Rinoa**

* * *

Even growing up going to extravagant, festive parties filled with all of the newest trends I had never been allowed to wear make-up, and so I wasn't sure what Quistis was doing as she applied the dark wet substance to my eyelids and _commanded_ me to stay still. Her work was precise and it took less than ten minutes on both eyes. Once she was done she ran a brush covered in a different black substance over my eyelashes, ordering me to blink every few moments.

My face felt weird and I could feel heat rising to my cheeks as Selphie and Quistis studied the blonde's handiwork. I felt a little better when Quistis finally let me stand to look at myself. From the concentration on her face I was expecting a tattoo of some sort, but instead my eyes were outlined with delicate charcoal while thin, even lines protruded slightly outward framing the corner of my eyes much like a cats. It's different and I love it.

"When did you learn how to do this?" I asked, studying the lines in the mirror.

"A couple years back when Squall and I were students together I use to get dolled up to get him to notice me. I use to have the biggest crush on him." Quistis sighed and shook her head. "Eventually I decided that he simply wasn't going to notice the effort because we had grown up together. He simply wasn't interested in me." She shrugged as she slipped her uniform jacket on over her black tank-top and readjusted her high waist skirt.

"Do you have any earrings, Rinoa?" Selphie asked from her mirror as she dabbed light pink gloss onto her lips and proceeded to rub them together.

"The only jewelry I have is this necklace," my hand reached up to grasp my mother's wedding band. It was thin and delicate and I couldn't imagine parting with it. Selphie studied it for a moment before rummaging through a box before pulling out two round metal studs with small crystal's hanging off them.

"You can have these. I bought like six pairs."

"And lost two in my room," Quistis sighed as she moved in front of the mirror to give herself a once over. They both looked so official in their uniforms and I felt like I looked silly. As I put the final touches on my outfit, including slipping into the four inch heels Quistis had found for me, I joined them in the mirror.

"We're gonna kill it!' Selphie jumped up and down before turning to place her hands on my shoulders. "Remember, if you don't try your hardest to get him to dance I will shave your head."

"I don't remember that being part of the deal," I narrowed my eyes at her, but couldn't help the smile that was spreading across my face.

"Let's go, we don't want the boys to have all of the fun."

* * *

Irvine and Zell were still on greeting Duty when we arrived. Irvine couldn't keep his eyes off Selphie as she sauntered in, purposely not looking at him. He was smitten and she was milking it, anyone with eyes could see that. As we approached the men, Selphie took over Zell's greeting position, adding a bit more pep than the guests were expecting while Quistis gave Irvine some sort of understood signal (at least, between them) that he was relieved and suddenly I had two men threading their arms with mine to pull me to a secluded corner.

If I hadn't spent the last few days around them I would have been nervous, instead I was simply confused.

"What's going on?" I narrowed my eyes at Irvine once they had let go of me and motioned to a waitress for drinks.

"You look good and we don't want Squall to see you just yet," Zell answered as Irvine's eyes found Selphie again.

"Are you guys in on the dancing dare?"

"Whoa ho hoo~" Irvine turned around, mischief gleaming in his eyes and suddenly I was regretting ever meeting him. A sentiment I'm sure a lot of girls shared. "And who dared you to dance with him?"

"I'm not sure what you're talking about," I tried to act innocent, even went so far as to attempt a 'puppy dog' look complete with my hands clasped behind my back and foot kneading the ground. He simply shook his head while Zell laughed.

"It was Selphie wasn't it?"

"I'm sure Quistis was in on it too," I sighed and crossed my arms, looking between my two… what should I call them? Are they friends? Is three days of funny conversations and bad jokes enough to build a friendship on? I'm sure it's a good start but have we really gotten to that point?

As I pondered the semantics a glass of hard cider was handed to me and Irvine and Zell fell into their own conversations as they watched people walk into the dance hall.

"So Seifer did show his ugly face," Zell's words hit my ears mid drink and I had to force my body not to react or else cider would be all over the back of Irvine's jacket.

"Seifer Almasy?" I asked after swallowing thickly, a little scared. I didn't want him to be here. In fact, this is the last place I would expect _her_ knight to be. In the ' _den of vipers'_ as she so aptly put it on our last meeting. She had sensed the awakening in my powers long before I realized what was going on and the memories of the time spent with Sorceress Edea were the stuff my nightmares were made of. If he was here there was no telling what he could divulge of my past, and these people I so adored would hate me.

"Yeah, he's the sorceress' lap dog here to cause trouble like he always does. He use to go to school with us before Squall, Selphie, and I passed our SeeD exam leaving him in the dust." Zell scratched his head before blue eyes found me. "How do you know him?"

"I'm Fury Caraway's daughter," I sighed as if he should know this. I'm sure at some point I mentioned it, but maybe it was just to Squall and the Headmaster when I first arrived here. An idea planted itself in my head and I went with it, "Seifer use to come over a lot when I was still at my dad's. We had a relationship but I ended it before I ran away a few months ago." Not all lies. Seifer had ended it, but I wasn't broken up about it. I was actually relieved because I had been fighting with myself for weeks on how I would let him down before I left. I certainly couldn't have him thinking there was still a chance something could happen between us while I was on the road. It would eat at my conscious.

"Bad break up, huh?" Irvine asked, looking sympathetic. I nodded. Hoping that the idea that he could be bitter about the way we parted could help cushion anything he would try to say about me.

"Oh, looks like Cid's beginning his speech." Zell pulled on Irvine's shirt while pointing to where the Headmaster stood on the stage. He walked up to the microphone slowly as all the sound in the room seemed to die at once.

"Greetings and welcome everyone! We are here to celebrate a year under the guidance of Commander Squall as he has lead us bravely through this time of war. His decisions were difficult, and many lost their lives for our cause, but in the end he has brought us forward. Now is a time to remember those lost in the past year, and the reason for that loss." _Edea_. The name bounced around in my head as Cid continued talking but I simply couldn't concentrate. There was the obligatory list of achievements and even a few honorable mentions to which Irvine and Zell both seemed pleased, letting me know their names were called.

Sometime during the speech Selphie and Quistis made their way over to us and stood in front of me, effectively blocking my view of the crowd and vice versa. Edea was looking for something, and this war was just a cover for it. If only I could remember what she was searching for I could help Squall and the others, maybe endear myself to them enough so that when the nasty truth of what I am comes out they won't immediately try to kill me. After all, I've already save Squall's life once.

"Rinoa," Selphie's light tap on my shoulder caught my attention as I was roused from my thoughts. Music filled the air and the central area was filled with people dancing.

"Hmm?" I hummed back to her, doing my best to focus. I had only had one drink but I was starting to feel sleepy.

"There's your man, go get him," Selphie nudged me forward, but not before pointing Squall out in the crowd. I nodded, downing the rest of my cider and gently placing it on the tray of a moving waitress. I wasn't surprised to see him standing alone with his back firmly connected to one of the large support beams. As I made my way to him people would stop in front of him to salute and say a few words before they went on their merry way. Sometimes he would simply nod, other times he would salute as well, always careful not to spill his drink.

Once I reached him the glass was empty and he was alone once again. His eyes fell on me for only a second before he seemed to disregard me as a nuisance. I wanted to huff in agitation, but instead I simply smiled and stepped closer to him, watching the sea of people as they danced so effortlessly to the beat.

"Dance with me," the words came out easier than I was expecting but the sudden nervousness of being rejected clung to my heart making it squeeze and contract in odd beats. The usual dismissal was already on his tongue when he closed his mouth and gave me a sheepish look.

"I never learned how to dance." He admitted, and then scowled. I was hoping it was at himself and not me.

"I'll lead," I offered, leaning closer to him. His eyes raked over me once again, this time doing a slow sweep, as if truly taking in my appearance. He had just opened his mouth to speak when a familiar throat clear sounded nearby and I turned to see the sly smile of Seifer Almasy in my personal space. I mean, yes technically I was in Squall's person space, but he didn't seem to be affronted by it like he usually was. I was beginning to wonder how many drinks he had already had when Seifer spoke.

"Heartily, wonderful to see you here. You're father's been looking everywhere for you," Seifer's green-blue eyes had never looked so snake-like before. I wanted to huff as my only response, but instead a false smile made it's way to my lips and all the years of being drilled on how to act like a lady seemed to finally take charge.

"Why, I haven't the slightest idea what you mean. I've simply been here. Certainly father got my missive?" I blinked twice as Seifer absorbed my lie. His smile simply grew and he offered me his hand, with a slight bow at his waist.

"Join me for a dance then? Leonheart here couldn't be bothered to try no matter how _attractive_ the woman is," the way he said attractive grated on my nerves like nails on a chalkboard or something heavy scraping roughly against concrete, but I took his hand anyway while offering Squall a single small _bye_ before being whisked away into the center of the dance floor. I promised myself once this dance was done I was going to make my way straight to my room and shave my head myself. There is not a single reason I would want to stay in this large room with this foul man any longer than necessary.

Seifer's hand gripped my waist tightly as he began leading the dance, forcing our bodies closer together than they should have been.

"You're looking very good, _Rinoa_ ," my name on his lips made my skin crawl and I was suddenly trying to remember what I had ever been attracted to in this man. He began leading the spin and I took a chance to breathe air that wasn't filled with the stench of his cologne.

"Thank you," I said quietly once I was pulled back into his arms and his fingers dug into my skin.

"Do your little SeeD friends know about you?" he whispered in my ear, his voice low and husky in an attempt to be seductive. Instead fear lanced through me and I _knew_ he had come to me in order to ruin whatever I had built here. "When are you going to choose a knight?" he pulled away and studied my face. The hand holding mine released it's grip and slowly ran it's way up my forearm. Seifer's fingers traced the thin lines of my wings and my breath caught in my throat. He took it as a sign of wanting his touch to continue, but to be perfectly honest he was making the blood in my veins turn to ice.

"Why would I need a knight?" I forced a smile, keeping my eyes level with his.

"You're going to be powerful one day, Rinoa, and when you are these friends you're making wont be there to save you," Seifer's smile became a little sadistic. "In fact, they're going to kill you."

* * *

 **Squall**

* * *

Seeing Seifer was an annoyance to say the least, but the way he whisked Rinoa away seemed to grate on a new nerve I didn't even know I had. I stayed in my corner, having small talk with passerby's when necessary. I kept finding my eyes searching the crowd for dark hair and a creamy dress that seemed to shimmer when she moved.

I frowned at myself as I tore my eyes from the sea of dancing people and hailed for another drink. This was the fourth, or maybe the fifth, and I was starting to get the light fuzzy feeling in my head that signaled that my buzz was starting to get closer to real drunk.

"Seifer's all over her," Selphie's voice reached me as she and Quistis walked around the edge of the dance floor.

"He's always been a bit touchy with girls." Quistis sighed and something cold ran down my spin as I remembered all of the girls Seifer had played with and thrown to the side. I took one last long gulp from my drink without a thought and stomped through the dancers, stopping just long enough to hand my almost empty glass to a sputtering Selphie. The music was beginning to slow when I reached where Seifer and Rinoa were dancing. Although it looked more like Seifer was running his hands all over Rinoa's curves and her bare shoulders than dancing. The girl looked uncomfortable with his fingers digging into her soft looking skin.

"May I cut in?" I asked, startling Seifer and receiving a confused, but appreciative look from Rinoa. Seifer sneered at me, but released Rinoa from his hold.

"I need to talk to Cid anyway." He gave me a haughty look before his eyes fell on Rinoa one last time, forcing her light skin to go pale. Once he was gone the music began up and I stood their awkwardly waiting for some sort of sign on what I should do.

"Thanks," Rinoa said quietly as people began swaying around us. After another awkward moment she began rubbing her arm, giving me a pensive look as she spoke again, "we can't be on the floor unless your dancing."

"I thought you said you'd lead," I scratched the back of my head, suddenly feeling extremely nervous and light headed. I shouldn't have drank so much. ' _She'd probably rather keep dancing with Seifer. At least he knows what he's doing.'_ I froze as the first self-deprecating thought of the night surfaced.

Despite my thoughts a smile found it's way on her lips and she stepped towards me, positioning my hands and looking up into my eyes. "I did," she nibbled on the bottom on her lip distractedly before she gently pulled me as she stepped back in time with the music. I let her steer me as the music continued and slowly I began to realize a pattern. After a few repeats of the same few moves I began trying to lead and a grin spread across Rinoa's face. There were a few blunders under my lead and I stepped on her feet a few times but she was regaining her color.

"Sorry," I muttered after the second time our heads bumped together. A giggle left her lips and she looked up at me, warm amber eyes shining in the light of the chandelier.

"You're learning, and you're doing great." Her voice was soft and something in the way she looked at me brought back images of a starry night and the cool air off the water. She looked up and her grin grew. She tugged on my sleeve and pointed up as shooting stars passed the glass ceiling. "Make a wish," her voice reached and suddenly I was very still.

' _She's only doing this to play nice. She doesn't even like you.'_ The voice cooed in my head and I did my best to force it away. The dance music faded and Rinoa began pulling me off the dance floor, color painted on her cheeks.

"Thanks for saving me back there," She smiled and it was like starlight to my blurred vision. I had only had five drinks and I was starting to feel too hot standing next to her. The dress she wore clung to her curves and her amber eyes were surrounded by dark lines making them clearer than anything else. "What did you wish for?" her voice was a little nervous and suddenly I wished I didn't feel so alone. She looked torn as her hand gripped mine harder and that's when I realized we were alone in a dark corner close to the balcony. Fresh air was just a few steps away but I didn't want to leave her here. ' _What if Seifer comes back to bother her?_ ' I rationalized.

"I-" I opened my mouth to tell her, like some drunk compulsion pulled out by those mesmerizing eyes when the voice came back. ' _She'll use your wish against you. She'll give you what you want only to take it away. She'll make you lonelier than before. You can't trust anyone.'_ More and more words I'd heard before on a loop. I didn't want to believe them but they were _always_ right. The voice had whispered to me about Ellone leaving, about all the people that followed me dying. If I told her now I would only get hurt. She was a stranger and I shouldn't be here with her like this.

"Squall?" She looked worried as her eyes searched mine. "What's wrong? You can tell me." ' _I don't' want to be alone'_ my mind screamed out as the voice kept repeating, ' _She'll leave you like all the rest. Your parents and your big sis. She'll be gone just like all the rest.'_ Her eyes were suddenly filled with understanding and she let go of my hand as I opened my mouth for the second time.

"I need some air," I mumbled out as I stepped away from her. She nodded once, a small smile playing on the edges of her lips.

"I'm here if you want to talk." Her voice was confident and sure and I wanted to believe her so badly but I just couldn't. She was only here for asylum to stay away from her father. She would be gone when she felt safe. I nodded before turning on my heel and stomping towards the balcony. Selphie and Irvine were in the far corner. Selphie was giggling and sloshing her full glass around, her words slurring together as pink dusted her cheeks.

"She actually got him to dance. I've never seen him so happy!" She looked excited as Irvine nodded, taking the glass delicately from her hand.

"Maybe she'll get through that icy exterior. We've all tried before but he actually smiled this time. Maybe she can be that one person he can trust." Irvine's face was close to Selphie's as she leaned in to grab her drink from him. I shouldn't have been watching. This wasn't my moment to see.

' _You could have this one day,'_ a gentle voice whispered. It sounded different though, softer than before. ' _All you have to do is trust in someone.'_

' _But you can't trust anyone,'_ the angry voice I was use to countered, forcing me to stay in place.

' _Everyone leaves you because no body has ever loved you.'_


	7. Chapter 7

**Rinoa**

* * *

I hadn't meant to do it. Squall had just looked so shaken up and my power simply reached out with my words through my concern. I had asked what was wrong and I _heard._ He was at war with himself and I wasn't sure how to help.

After waiting thirty minutes for him to come back to me I had left. As much as I wanted to help I didn't want Seifer finding me again and digging his hands into my skin.

It's been two days since the ball and I still find myself looking for his blonde head and signature 'bad boy' smirk. I was starting to regret ever showing interest in the boy. But I was so lonely at the time and he seemed to enjoy my company until... No, it wouldn't have mattered in the end, we would have split. No use dwelling on it.

"Hey Rinoa, did Squall tell you the news?" Zell leaned over the lunch table and stage whispered. Everyone _but_ Squall looked up from their food, eyes suddenly on me.

"Probably not." I shrugged, ignoring the weird churning in my stomach as I looked over at the man who had barely touched his food. He was engrossed in some special file and hadn't bothered saying a word to me since the ball. I was beginning to learn that this was common, and very annoying. "What news?"

"Cid wants you to come with us on our trip to Timber. We're going to check on the resistances and make sure the T.V. Station is still up and running."

"Why would Cid want me to come?" I pulled a few strands of hair behind my ear, trying to keep my eyes on the tattooed blonde and not the brunette who was mumbling into his file.

"That's the best part! Squall chose me as your body guard. I'm going so you're going!"

"No fair!" Selphie groaned from her seat next to Irvine, effectively grabbing Squall's attention. "I wanna be Rinoa's body guard!"

"Zell was there when it was being discussed," Squall's answer was punctuated with a shrug and I almost felt dismissed. Almost. His eyes lingered on me for a few moments longer than normal before returning to the papers in front of him. At least, I think they did.

Maybe I was reading into things.

"Hey Quistis, are there any non-SeeD para-magic classes I could take to become a medic or a healer? Professionally." I looked down at my plate as she pondered my question.

"There are a few," she finally said before forking some sort of fish into her mouth. After what felt like an eternity of chewing she swallowed and looked at me with narrowed eyes."Why do you ask?"

"Well I just like it here so much," I began playing with my fingers. It was true. Only a week in and I'm pretty sure I'm in love. With the school. "If there was a way for me to become employed here without _actually_ becoming a SeeD I wouldn't have to leave." Squall's eyes shot up from his papers to stare at me, but no one else seemed to notice as Selphie threw herself over the table to hug me.

"We wouldn't let you go even if you wanted to leave!" She squealed as Irvine gently dug his fingers into her hips to pull her off of me. She didn't yell at him like normal and a thought popped into my head that I would have to keep till later.

"I'm sure there are some classes, but they won't be beginning until the semester ends." Quistis looked up as if calculating something in her head. "You still have plenty of time to sign up, but you have to get the headmaster's consent."

"Show me where later?" I asked as the bell dismissing the hour lunch block ended. She nodded before standing, looking a little agitated as she watched some of her students rough-housing on their way back to class.

"Sometimes I wonder why I became a teacher," she sighed before following them, her stern instructor voice calling after them. She may complain about her students but we all know she loves her job. For the mission to Timber she is being temporarily replaced by Xu. Since the ball I've seen the two instructors discussing lesson _and_ contingency plans. It was supposed to be a routine check of the area but I guess as a SeeD your life is in constant danger out in the field so it's good to have back up plans should the worst come.

My mind wandered to what Squall's plans could be and I shook my head, deciding not to dwell on it. As a group we left the cafeteria and he walked in front of me, folder clutched in his hand and face set forward as Selphie attempted to get mission details out of him.

"You already received your over view Selphie. You know what we're doing," he almost growled the words as she kept poking at him.

"Yeah, but your folder has all the extra details." She pouted and he sighed giving in and opening the file.

"The only addition is this sticky note that Cid wrote saying 'don't let Rinoa die.'" Selphie leaned closer to look at it and then… She snatched the note and ran before Squall could tell her not to. An aggravated sigh left him as his eyes followed her retreating form. Zell chased after her, yelling about how it was _his_ job to keep me safe. That left Irvine to pick up his pace, leaving me no time to question the sudden close-ness between him and Selphie.

Before I realized it we were alone again and I wasn't sure what I should do. Squall cleared his throat and looked almost pained as he opened his mouth to talk. My curiosity piqued, but I forced the reaching arm of my magic down before I could hear things that weren't mine to hear.

Squall closed his mouth, frowning and I let out an internal sigh.

"Irvine and Selphie seem closer," I let my previous thoughts out instead of saying something dumb.

"They kissed at the party," Squall said roughly as we began walking again. I heard the words but I didn't actually _hear_ them.

"What?" I turned to look at him, disbelieving. The idea wasn't permeating my brain tissue. More like it was bouncing around tying, and failing, to find a place to root itself. I had given Selphie advice, but I didn't think she would follow it so soon, or at all. She is the spirited type, after all.

"Yeah," Squall cleared his throat as he scratched the back of his head with his hand. He looked embarrassed and I wasn't sure why. I also couldn't believe he was gossiping. "I saw it when I went to get some air on the balcony." He mumbled the last words, but I still heard them. A very unladylike snort left me and he just stared at me.

"You were spying on them weren't you," I gave him a sly grin and a blush creeped up to his cheeks as his permanent frown found its way back to his face.

"I happened to walk by," he growled, picking up the pace. I easily matched it, skipping beside him with my hands clasped behind my back.

"You know, you're a pretty decent dancer. I could give you lessons if you're ever interested." This caused him to slow down and I simply kept skipping until I was two large tiles ahead of him. "Didn't you enjoy yourself?" I turned around and studied his face. He looked conflicted for a long moment before sighing.

"I did," he finally said, making eye contact with me. My heart beat a little faster until he opened his mouth again. "However, I don't think it's wise to be getting to close to me." He began walking again, passing me quickly with his long strides.

He was dismissing me again, like I was trivial. I frowned as a pain I knew all to well reared its ugly head. Instead of letting the rejection discourage me I simply plastered on a sickeningly sweet smile before calling after him. "Offer stands if you change your mind."

* * *

 **Selphie**

* * *

The brunette was upset. Yes her plan worked and she got Zell and Irvine out of the hallway so she could do a little spying on how Squall interacts with Rinoa. However, she hadn't expected the two to listen in as well. Her face was red hot when Squall admitted he watched her and Irvine kiss. Selphie hadn't meant to do it, she was just entranced at the moment and couldn't have pulled away if she wanted to. And to be perfectly honest she had wanted that kiss for a long time. Now Zell knew and she was sure Quistis would found out before night fall.

Rinoa offered to give Squall dancing lessons and suddenly she wasn't so worried about whatever was going on between herself and the cowboy listening intently next to her. Squall almost sounded like he wanted to agree to them. He even _admitted he had fun_. This never happens. Squall doesn't find anything fun. Ever.

And then the words she was dreading left his lips and Selphie's mood plummeted. ' _I don't think it's wise for you to be getting close to me.'_ He always said this when someone was starting to get to him. He had growled it at Selphie soon after their first encounter. Maybe that was simply to discourage her from asking him to join the Garden Festival Committee, but it had the effect he wanted. He had pushed them all away and they had let it happen, one way or another Squall had found himself an island surrounded by friends, but no one else was allowed on it.

"Offer stands if you change your mind!" Rinoa called almost cheerfully as footsteps neared their eavesdropping position. Selphie felt panic rise in her as an aggravated huff could be heard from the owner. They did _not_ want to get caught listening in. Zell took this as a cue to begin a silent fight over the sticky note still firmly in Selphie's hand. His tugs were half-hearted, but the desperate look in his eyes couldn't be faked. He knew just as well as Selphie did that the last thing they wanted was to get caught listening and so she played along.

When Squall finally did round the corner they had a semi-convincing wrestling match going, with Irvine playing referee. Their act wasn't necessary though, as Squall walked by them with a troubled and confused look on his face, so lost in his own head that he couldn't be bothered to care what idiotic thing his teammates were up to. They dropped the act when Rinoa rounded the corner looking a little sad.

Selphie shot her an understanding look as Rinoa returned it with one of suspicion. "It seems that Squall isn't the only one who spies on their friends around here." The dark haired girl raised an eyebrow as she waiting for Selphie to spill on exactly _why_ they had been doing it.

"He seemed so happy at the dance," Irvine blurted out as Selphie and Zell nodded in agreement.

"We just figured you'd be able to at least get through some of his hard headed seclusion, but he just gave you the line."

"What line?" Rinoa asked as she stepped closer, looking confused. Selphie sighed, sagging her shoulders with the exhalation of air.

"You shouldn't get close to me," Selphie did her best impression of Squall as she squared her shoulders and placed a hand in front of half of her face, a frown etched onto her otherwise cheerful face. It was so ridiculously spot on that Rinoa couldn't stop the peels of laughter shaking her body if she had wanted to.

A grin quickly overtook Selphie's face as she joined in before it slowly tapered off, an uneasy frown taking its place and stealing Rinoa's attention.

"So what?" Rinoa placed her knuckles into her hip, leaning forward enough for hair to fall over her shoulders. "I think he needs someone to look after him, even if he's strong enough to take care of himself." Selphie stared at the girl as her words floated through the air, awed in the simple statement. "Even if he hates me for it, he's going to realize he has people that care about him. He seems so lonely." Rinoa sighed this time before shooting Selphie a small grin.

"Where have you been our whole lives?" Irvine asked, throwing his arms up in mock thanks to the gods.

"Think you guys will be able to help me with this?" Rinoa looked a little sheepish now, as if they would outright deny her their help.

"What are friends for?" Selphie's usual grin overtook her face as she ran forward and embraced the other girl. Her newest friend was going to do great things, she could feel it in her bones.

* * *

 **Ultimecia**

* * *

The boy was an annoyance, his sneering face never leaving the sorceress' side due to his childish hopes of protecting her. Hah! If only he knew the truth, of why she _really_ put up with his ever present groaning over the lion boy and the ever-present 'holier than thou' air he emanated around her weaker servants.

' _Leave him alone_ ,' the weakened voice of the body owner pleaded, adding kindling to Ultimecia's hate. Oh how the future sorceress couldn't wait to crush these insignificant bugs.

"She's with them," the boy said quietly after giving his boring report of the SeeD ball. He had received an invitation under the pretenses of 'establishing peace' between the Garden and herself. Oh how that foolish Headmaster begged and pleaded when she had taken over his wife's form. Crushing him would be even better, forcing the weak Edea to watch as her husband pleads for his life will be much more intoxicating than his attempts to free her.

"Who?" Ultimecia blinked, amber eyes spearing her ' _knight'_ and he flinched. Weak.

"Rinoa," he frowned at her, his fear abated for the moment to be replaced with his confusion.

"I couldn't care less about that insignificant wench. She can't even accept what it is she is, and what she's destined to become. I've no time to babysit her." Edea's hand waved away his blank stares as a thoughtful look painted her face. "It is Ellone we need now. She holds the key. Should the lion boy get close to the wench my future is as much set in stone to be ruin and agony."

"We will continue the search for Ellone," the boy bowed, his strong shoulders straight and his eyes focused on counting flecks of dirt. He is sub servant and not _worthy_ of his duties, but it _must be him_.

' _Leave him,'_ the weakened voice forced a bit of her own power into the command, startling Ultimecia. A growl escaped Edea's throat, but slowly it turned into a purr as a thought crossed her mind.

"Send my troops to conduct the search, I have something much more important for you to do. A necessary task I'm sure you will be up for." The smile stretching across Edea's pretty face was full of poison and ill-intent. Ultimecia forced the body to walk towards the full length mirror. As her _knight_ waited patiently for her command she studied her _true_ reflection, admiring the pallor of her skin, the pale gold of her eyes and the marks of power visible on her slightly rosy cheeks, much like Edea's. Long silver hair fell over her shoulders, framing her beautiful face. She had inherited quite a lot from her once beautiful mother, if not her coloring than at least the features they were attached to. Sweet, pliable flesh and silken hair.

"What would you wish of me, my Queen," the boy bowed once more, but this time his face lifted, the blank look of another servant on his beautiful face, but deep inside she could feel the readiness to do as she commanded, and the hate he felt for those she was sending him to. The smile marred her beautiful features into a mask of horror as she turned.

"I'm sending you back to Garden. There's something of import you need to do, and it must be done in a years time."

"Anything for you, my Queen."

* * *

 **A/N**

I'm sorry for the late update. Things are going to happen soon! Horrible wonderful things!


	8. Chapter 8

**Squall**

* * *

My teammates remained, for the most part, out of my way for the few days before we deported for Dollet. It was strange having hushed whispers at the lunch table and to not be forced into conversations about training or stocking supplies or even which girl was more attractive.

I _almost_ missed the interactions forced upon me.

All bets were off, however, when we climbed down the ladder and planted our feet on solid land for the first time in two weeks. Selphie forced me to chose where we would eat, Zell _demanded_ I go to the pub owner and play a game of cards and Irvine was… Well he wasn't bothering me but he was all over Rinoa. Her personal space had been breached multiple times so that he could sling his arm over her shoulder and whisper things that would make her blush. Quistis remained quiet near my side, her blue eyes studying the rest of our team.

Whatever they had planned, it seemed, she wasn't in on. And they always have _something_ planned. After eating at a seaside bistro, mostly to get Selphie's complaining out of my ear we were on our way to the pub to relax in our few precious off hours.

"Don't you think you're a little close," Selphie whispered behind me at Irvine who, for the first time in ten minutes, wasn't hanging off of Rinoa like a sling.

"Zell's got her covered," was his answer. I kept my eyes forward as Zell was playing tour guide, showing off all the stores we've been to at least ten times. Rinoa hung onto his every word and for a moment I wondered what it would have been like if I had attempted to give her a tour of the Garden similar to Zell's.

I scoffed at the thought and continued walking, occasionally bumping arms with Quistis. It wasn't until we were at the pub that she tapped on my shoulder as the rest of our group piled in.

"You bring your cards?" She raised an eyebrow and I nodded. Of course I would. This is almost as close to I get as far as 'good luck' signs go. Whenever I win against the pub owner the missions usually go smoothly. Then again, I've never lost so I'm not sure what would happen if I did. "Good luck." Her smile was knowing and I narrowed my eyes at her. Without another words she disappeared into the pub and I was left on the streets, alone.

Laughter bubbled up from someone in the pub, and roaring applause followed afterwards. As I stepped inside I watched as Rinoa began sorting through her cards, a drink in hand. She was up against one of the regulars who wasn't very skilled, but she didn't seem very confident.

She stole a glance my way and winked.

An odd feeling ran down my spine and I brushed it off, chalking it up to change in atmosphere. Our first day on land was always spent this way and by nightfall we would all find our way to the hotel. The _real_ mission begins tomorrow anyway.

I bought myself a drink and made my way to the edge of the crowd, watching as Rinoa played. She was thoughtful, often times looking at Zell or Irvine for help. She lost the first game, but won the next two.

As she moved onto the next opponent Selphie sat herself beside me, quiet and poised.

"What are you guys planning," I asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow at her. Selphie isn't the calm and composed type. She's energetic and 'spunky,' filled with all sorts of ideas involving explosions and romance. I only know this because I came across her public journal one day and couldn't take my eyes off of the words plastered on the screen. She was very detailed when explaining her favorite kinds of explosives and she's no longer allowed to detonate fireworks, ever.

"We're just helping Rinoa let loose. She wanted to learn how to play so Zell's been teaching her in his off time."

I snorted. Zell doesn't have the _patients_ to teach someone. Selphie shot me a dark look and I sobered my expression long enough to scowl back at her. I miss the days when this mask would scare them away. What happened to want them to cling to me anyway? With a huff I was left alone as Selphie found a new spot to roost.

As I pondered the moment my four comrades became something, _almost_ , close to friends Rinoa lost her first game to her new opponent. I almost felt bad for her until she began the next round and wiped the floor with him. Her cheers were infectious and everyone was trying to buy her drinks. A few men could be seen leering in a nearby corner, but Quistis kept herself firmly between the girl in blue and the lecherous men.

Maybe she was in on it too. Or maybe she simply knew her comrades well enough to fall into their plans without needing all the details.

The other three members of the group were standing in other strategic locations, keeping Rinoa in their sights at all time. It was almost as if they _all_ wanted to be her body guard.

* * *

 **Zell**

* * *

The plan was running seamlessly, if Zell had anything to do with it. Irvine and Selphie had come up with the details and Zell had been the muscle they needed to keep it in action. As per usual all of the _really_ creepy men all clustered in one corner, and that's where he stood. His blue eyes scanning the room like it was an incredibly important mission and if he messed up the entire world would end.

Maybe he should take his real missions this seriously, but this had to do with his friends. Squall was watching everything from his spot leaning against the bar, his eyes only leaving Rinoa when he was scanning for the rest of their team. With every win Rinoa was coming closer to her chance at challenging the pub owner, and if she succeeded in winning she could challenge Squall and he couldn't refuse, not while he was here. Pub rules wouldn't allow it.

A lot of research, mostly done by Quistis in her off hours, had them in the loop with all the new card rules and regulations. This particular pub has it's own special rule and it was guaranteed to get Squall to at least have to spend a little time with _someone_.

Should someone beat the pub owner they have the right to challenge anyone in the pub to a game, and they can't refuse. Cards won't be lost if they don't want to participate, but for the fun of the sport and bragging rights, it was put in there after one old man complained that his son wouldn't play with him. A very, _very_ , drunk old man.

This rule would fall in their favor.

Rinoa was _killing_ it out there. Zell grinned as he watched her size up each of her opponents on the first round, taking the smallest drink from her alcoholic beverage as possible. She always lost the first round, why he wasn't sure, but what he did know was that she decimated on the next two. Best two out of three and then on to the next one.

The pub owner was watching too, from a dark corner next to the stairs. He's always down for a good party so when he heard the applause he couldn't _help_ but show himself. They knew that from frequenting this place so often.

Zell caught a signal from Quistis and stepped aside, letting one of the 'not so dangerous' drunks free from the corner. Rinoa was in on most of the plan, just not the running bet he and his comrades, sans Squall of course, had going on in the back ground. One, and only one, man was to hit on Rinoa in an hour, if they could help it. They each got to pick one guy.

Quistis was interested to see how long it would take Squall to react, if he would at all. Selphie and Irvine were absolutely positive he would interfere at least once before they retired to the hotel a couple blocks away, and Zell. Well Zell was betting that Squall would knock one of the guys out.

They weren't really concerned about Rinoa in the 'she's a damsel in distress' kind of way. They had all grown close to her since she found her way to Garden and they considered her a friend. Zell thought of her as a sister.

Rinoa won her last game on the ground floor as the drunk wandered towards her and leaned against her back. She froze immediately, looking like a deer caught in headlights.

Without prompting Squall was there, pulling the guy away with a rough yank, his signature scowl plastered on his face.

One hour down, at least four more to go.

* * *

 **Rinoa**

* * *

I was having fun, _real_ fun. Not the 'forced into stuffy rooms with rich snobs' or 'piano lessons that lasted hours' or 'tight pinching shoes and dresses that made it hard to breathe' variety that my _father_ so kindly put me through. I was done with that kind of fun.

After my last card game downstairs, and the creep trying to feel up on me, I took a little break, letting my body relax to the blues music streaming from the speakers. There was a very relaxed atmosphere to this pub, and I was really enjoying myself.

I leaned against the bar to order my second drink when a man bumped into me, spilling his alcohol down the front of my shirt and soaking the thin material.

"So sorry!" the man exclaimed, looking genuine for all of three seconds. Once his eyes did a cursory sweep and he liked what he saw he leaned in closer to me, his body heat and proximity giving me chills. "You know we can go out back and I can keep you warm while your clothes are drying.

"Not a snowflake's chance in hell," I pulled away from the creep and he latched onto my arm. From the corner of my eye I could see Irvine and Zell running in to save me. Thank god.

"Unhand her," a very pissed off sounding Squall almost _growled_ behind me. I could feel the anger radiating off of him without my extra-sensory abilities. The guy seemed to freeze under Squall's gaze. As If compulsed by magic, the man let go of my arm and turned on his heel, almost sprinting towards the nearest exit.

"Ah, Squall, always good to hear you causing trouble in my pub," A happy looking man with wrinkles near his eyes laughed. I turned to the side to get a better look at him. He was in his late fifties at least, wearing comfortable pants and a button up shirt.

"Sorry for the outburst," Squall looked almost mortified as if he hadn't expected himself to be so angry.

"Let's play a game, shall we? I'm sure your friend here will be challenging me soon," he gave me a cheerful wink before walking towards the stairs, his pace steady and sedate. Squall looked torn before he looked over his shoulder to find Zell and Irvine whispering at the outskirts of a crowd a few yards away. He stood there for a moment, warring with himself before shrugging off his jacket and tossing it at me.

"You two," Squall growled, his scowl deepening. The poor boys straightened up immediately, looking both terrified and… were they laughing? As I studied their faces Squall barked out an order of 'keep Rinoa safe' before he turned to follow the owner.

"You heard the man," I narrowed my eyes at the two. They were trying to act innocent, but the longer they tried to keep down the laughter the harder it seemed to be for them. "What's so funny," if I could have narrowed my eyes any further while still being able to see them, I would have. The jacket in my grasp was warm and thick, with fur around the hood. As I pulled it over my bare arms I was engulfed in the familiar scent of Squall, one that had haunted my nightmares since his almost dive off the bridge. He hasn't acted like that since I rescued him and accidentally (probably) removed the memory from his grasp. Maybe it was a one time thing and there was nothing to worry about?

"We'll tell you after we get to the hotel," Irvine promised, signaling to the girls to join the group. "We moving on?"

I nodded, forcing thoughts of Squall's scent and anything else related to him away as Selphie wrapped her arms around my shoulders, a triumphant whoop leaving her lungs.

"This girl is on _fire!_ " Her call caused the bar patrons to whoop and holler along with her as we moved onto the tables upstairs. It wasn't necessarily required to beat all of the card masters that rented tables here. It was, however, a good warm up. I had three players and two hours of daylight left before the night crowd would be crawling in and I didn't want whatever victory I had to get swept away in the tides of cheering people. Apparently it was a really big deal when anyone _other_ than Squall beat the pub owner. I just wanted the honor to be able to coerce Squall into a game.

It's not exactly a dirty tactic to get him to open up a little. Even if all we end up doing is playing cards every so often, at least I know he's getting some kind of human interaction that he'll kind of enjoy. Maybe. little butter flies in my stomach began to attack as I thought about spending afternoons playing cards in the library or at lunch. I shook my head, trying to steady my thoughts.

I'm not even sure what _I_ want out of this, other than for the gang's plan to work.

* * *

My last three games were flawless and I was nervous. Squall was waiting by the entrance to the pub owner's special room. A small smirk sat on his lips and it did wonders to light up his steely eyes. I could almost see small flecks of green in the direct light of the setting sun.

"He's expecting you." Squall stood up. He towered over me, forcing me to look up to keep eye-contact.

"If I win, will you play me?" I asked, my own lips turning upwards into a smirk. The butterflies were back and I could almost lose myself in those eyes.

"Sure, if you manage to win." Squall seemed sure of the pub owner's capabilities, which caused me to become even more nervous. I nodded, tearing my eyes away from him. I stepped out of the dimly lit pub to take a look at the setting sun before finishing the walk across the 'bridge.' It was a beautiful sunset, painting the sky a rosy red with gold for clouds. Sunsets at Garden were just as beautiful as this one, but I still couldn't stop myself from marveling at the beauty.

Deling city doesn't have sunsets like this, too many crowded buildings and such a large amount of light pollution… the sky turns a hazy grey before tapering out to a pitch black hidden behind the glare of yellow street lights. Mother use to take me to the beach far away from the light pollution so that we could watch the sunset together. That was such a long time ago though, it's hard to remember what she looked like painted in the light red's and oranges. I took a deep, grounding breath before tearing my eyes away from the masterpiece painting itself across the sky.

The pub owner welcomed me warmly and offered me a comfortable seat at a custom built Triple Triad table.

"It's been a long time since someone other than Squall has stepped foot in here."

"It's a little daunting," I admitted, swallowing thickly.

"I see you've been playing best out of three matches, very smart of you," he noted as he began shuffling through his cards, occasionally looking up at me as if sizing me up against the pieces of card-stock in his hands.

"Would you prefer to play only one game?" I asked, blinking at him. He was calm and collected, this was his domain after all.

"We'll flip a coin, heads it's one game, tails it's best two out of three," he offered and I nodded. Without hesitation he pulled a coin from his pocket and flipped it twice before catching it midair and slamming it down on the back of his hand. "Would you do the honors?" His smile was relaxed and it ate some of my nerves away. I nodded and he lifted his hand, revealing the coin to me.

"One game," I said a little quietly and he chuckled.

"This coin always has been in my favor. Let's see what you've got girlie." I nodded, placing my first card down, facing him. It had a strong bottom and right defense, but a weak upper and left defense, making the top left corner the perfect home for it.

The pub owner whistled clicking his tongue as he looked over his hand. He placed a card in the bottom right, with a one sticking out to the left. It was a trick, it had to be.

I took the bait anyway, finding a card with a high left defense and a two on the right. I claimed the card with a blue token and he nodded approvingly. He set his next card down situating it in the bottom left corner with a nine sticking out of the top. It was safe as the highest I had was an eight. Five more cards would determine the winner.

"So, how long have you known Squall?" my opponent asked as I chose a card to put in the leftmost available slot. The only thing that would beat it was a nine.

"A little over a week," I said thoughtfully. "He takes some getting use to," I frowned as he placed a card in the top spot, a five and a three facing outwards. I looked over my cards carefully before claiming the right top corner and placing my token on his card.

"Did he teach you? You're very talented," the small talk was a nice distraction from the nerves eating me alive. I was in the lead, but that could always change. Two cards left.

He placed a card in the center spot, placing one of his chips on my card. He left only one number to flip, and I could beat it.

"No, our comrade Zell did," I chewed on my bottom lip as I set the card down and claimed its neighbor with a token. Another whistle, this one a little astonished.

"Well you've done well." The pub owner smiled at me before separating our cards and offering his hand for me to look through.

"Thank you," I couldn't keep the smile off my face as I plucked the high defense card out and handed him the rest of his cards.

"Squall won't underestimate you like I did," the man scratched the back of his head as he stood, offering me his hand. "Good luck and feel free to stop by any time"

* * *

 **Squall**

* * *

Cheering roared out as the pub owner admitted his defeat. Rinoa beamed in the spotlight, the last tendrils of sunlight a backlight almost setting her on fire. She confidently walked over to me, placing her hands firmly on her hips as she sized me up.

"Let's do this," she motioned towards an empty triple triad table and the small crowd gathered on the second floor roared. Seeing her in my jacket caused an odd feeling in my stomach, almost close to nausea but not exactly there. It had been a spur of the moment decision to lend it to her. The dark colors contrasted with pale skin and she had it zipped up only half way.

' _Well this is new,'_ I found it was difficult to keep the smirk off my face as we sat and chose our hand. Her confidence was almost overwhelming.

' _What kind of man would you be if you lost?'_

The question stole the smirk from me as we began our game.

"Best two out of three," Rinoa smiled at me as she placed her first card down. I nodded and set my own down, flipping hers easily. Her next card flipped hers back over and mine did nothing but sit in the corner. She flipped another, I flipped the next.

Our first game ended in a draw.

I stared at the cards in front of me, replaying the game in my head as I sorted for new cards. Rinoa just smiled, wiggling a bit in her seat as Irvine began rubbing her shoulders. I frowned at him but it did nothing to stop the contact.

What would it be like to so casually touch someone like that?

I motioned for another drink as I shoved the question aside. Rinoa peered at me over her hand of cards, her large brown eyes studying me intently.

We started again, our cards just as evenly matched the second time. As I took long gulps of the throat searing liquid, served to me by a flirt" of a waitress. She huffed at me when her attempts failed. Rinoa's eyes followed the girl, a frown etching its way onto the creamy skin of her face.

"Why do you always push people away?" Her voice was low against the chatter of nearby bar patrons. I shrugged and placed down my next card.

Rinoa nibbled on her lip the entire game, it was distracting to say the least and we ended in another draw. Agitation flared up as I scolded myself, ordering another drink.

' _She's better than you,'_ the voice slunk out of hiding, sounding smug. My hand twitched after I set down my glass. The crowd was starting to grow and Rinoa looked… Nervous? Another game began and she was distracted, she made two small mistakes that cost her the victory. The crowd around us had mixed feelings about the ending of the game, but Rinoa simply gave me a tight lipped smile before slipping out of her seat and weaving through the crowd.

I opened my mouth to call out for her, my gaze following her retreating form until it was swallowed up by the mass of bodies filling the upstairs pub.

What would I even say to her? Was she so upset by the loss that she needed time to be alone or was something else vexing her?

Why should I care anyway? With drink in hand I meandered towards the stairs, feeling sleepy.

My comrades were waiting by the banister, worry on their faces.

"Well one of you needs to go after her," Irvine scratched the back of his head, eyeing the back door of the pub.

"Maybe she just needs to breathe," Quistis offered, worrying her bottoms lip. It wasn't as eye drawings as Rinoa's own nervous habit. As my brain tried to decide why that was eyes turned to me, looks of hope and wary judgement in equal numbers.

"You couldn't just let her win," Selphie huffed, crossing her arms and giving me what she thought was a pensive look. Her face was scrunched up in a ridiculous attempt at a scold.

"Something was bothering her," I sipped on my last drink of the night, the burn just barely keeping me awake. This much social interaction was exhausting and I was almost at my limit. "She was distracted, Zell should go after her, make sure she's fine and stays that way." I pushed through them, descending the stairs. I paused for a moment at the halfway point and looked back at them. "I'm turning in for the night."

* * *

 **A/N**

Triple Triad has never been my strong suit and I couldn't muster the energy to look up the cards and values and whatnot. Maybe when I have more motivation I'll go back and fix the cards part so it's more than just number values and placements.

Next chapter will be a little more of Dollet and then they're on their way to Timber! I've got exciting things planned so let me know what you think and if you have any suggestions for where you would like to see the story go! I'm up for ideas!


	9. Chapter 9

**Rinoa**

* * *

All of the bodies surrounding us had made that little tingle of magic flair up on my arms, waiting to be called forth. Even way back when I was forced into social interaction by mandates I've loathed for forever, I've always felt a little nervous in large groups of people. Maybe it was the seclusion of my childhood, maybe it was the budding powers lingering underneath my skin waiting to be revealed. All I was certain of was that if I didn't get out of that pub soon I was going to have either a panic attack or _be_ attacked.

I couldn't keep hiding this forever. Maybe if I just came out and told them it wouldn't be so bad. I mean, there are ways to prevent the full on transformation isn't there?

My 'marks of power' are my wings, etched in scars along my shoulders and down my arms to my wrists. They've yet to be outlined, yet to fully raise or color or whatever it is they decide to do. My 'coming into power' or whatever nonsense Edea called it has yet to be completed. I could still hide it, still find some way to stop it from happening if I just tried hard enough.

Unfortunately no one could tell me what stops a sorceress' transformation, or even how the power chooses it's new host. We don't even know how many of us there are spread across the world. There could be hundreds of thousands, or there could be only two.

As I leaned against the cool brick wall, buffered by Squall's jacket, I couldn't help but ponder what it would be like to let the power loose and be done with it. No more hiding or pretending, no more boosted para-magic, and waking up in the middle of the night to keep the raised lines in my arms from becoming actual wings and casting whatever magic was forming in my sleep. Would I be hunted or feared? Could I keep the friends I've made in the past week or so? Would they think of me as a monster or a traitor?

And what about Cid, their leader? I know he knows what I am and yet he simply stays to the sidelines allowing me into his school, around his most trusted SeeDs, to exist at all. He has said nothing about my existence outside of me being _Rinoa_ and that I _need to be protected_. A warm ocean breeze caressed my cheek and made me feel flushed. Alcohol probably wasn't the best decision, even if I've only had a glass or two of that fruity mix the bartender made me. I rubbed my eyes as the backdoor opened and a head of spiky blonde hair popped out to survey the surrounding area.

"You doing okay?"

"I think so," I mumbled, leaning harder against the wall. I took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of Squall's jacket before deciding that he was the best smelling guy alive and that I should give this back to him before I end up keeping it.

"What happened?" Zell stepped out of the door, ignoring the loud clang it made as it shut. He was so concerned for my well being it almost made me want to rip my heart out and give it to him on a silver platter. I'm lying to them all by omitting the truth, I don't deserve sympathy like this.

I opened my mouth to tell him everything, to let him know what I am and to beg for whatever forgiveness he could find in his heart when all that tumbled out was "I get panic attacks in large crowds." I blinked at the air, trying to figure out how my brain had messed up my wording when he gave me another heart-wrenching sympathetic look before leaning against the wall a foot away from me.

"You should have told us and we would have done a better job at keeping the crowd away," blue eyes were studying me with unabashed concern and I felt terrible. I opened my mouth to tell him the _truth_ , when another half-truth left my lips.

"You guys have already done so much for me, I just wanted the plan to work."

"Don't be silly, you're one of us now, even if Leonhart ends up pushing you away too," Zell's fist gave my shoulder a light tap and I couldn't keep the smile off my face. I wrestled with my inner conflicts for a moment, deciding that now would be as good a time as any to just come out and say it.

'I'm a sorceress,' was at the tip of my tongue, ready to fly and probably ruin my life when, "You're the best," took it's place. Zell was oblivious to the slight my own body was pulling. Frustration grew when a little voice in the back of my head began whispering.

 _'You can't tell them, It's against the rules,'_ the voice was little more than a hiss, but the shiver that ran down my spine brought it forefront and center. ' _If you want them to know you have to show them. You have to let the power loose and_ command _it._ ' Zell motioned for me to follow him and my body did while my brain was having a miniature panic attack. Edea must have done this on our last meeting. That conniving _witch_ actually cast a curse on me, making it impossible for me to reveal what I am without harnessing my magic and wielding it.

I've done such tiny, accidental things with it since the power awakened. Saving Squall and erasing his memory is the biggest one to date and it was almost like a reflex. I had to save him from meeting a watery grave, I had no other choice. Getting that tiny glimpse into his head was a complete breech of social etiquette and another accident. If I'm not careful I'll end up letting my power loose and hurt someone because of another _accident_. There are things that come naturally, like seeing auras and energies affected by a persons emotional state or an occasional glimpse into the past if I hold an object with a great deal of emotional value. Things that happen that I can turn off but take no real magical energy. Like they're just a part of my body now, ready to be wielded at my disposal effortlessly and at times they've come in handy.

I've been trying to use them less, to keep myself as far away from the weird magical mojo going on as I can manage but they're useful and I kind of like knowing how someone is feeling without actually _knowing_ what's bothering them or why their happy.

Zell was talking and I wasn't listening. The only thing I caught was 'Odine' and 'magic' in the long string of blurred words.

"Wait, what?" I asked, finally back in control of my own mouth.

"Oh I was just saying that your junction accessory is one of the original ones Odine made waaayyyy back when magic was considered the worst thing in the world. I mean yeah, sorceresses got that whole 'unlimited magic from the life stream' thing going on but from studying Adele he was able to give common every day folk para-magic and I think it's really cool."

"It was my dads," my hand fell to the battered clip resting on my belt. It didn't look like much, in reality it was similar in shape to a money clip.

"Now-a-days you can get them in earrings and rings, even necklace pendants. Most of the time you can't even tell a person is using junctioned magic the usage is so fluid."

"You're really into this kind of stuff, huh?" I studied Zell as his face lit up with a smile.

"When it comes to magic, Odine brand is number one. I even heard he made Sorceress repressive jewelry at one point, but a few of the pieces got lost and then Adele got sent up into space so there was really no need for it." Zell clicked his tongue after he spoke as if it would help punctuate his words.

"What kind of pieces?" I kept the conversation going, mostly interested in the fact that there were pieces of jewelry that existed that _might_ keep my magic contained, and only half listening to keep myself awake. The warm salt breeze plus the alcohol in my system was making me sleepy and it was hard to motivate myself to keep moving when I was very aware that Zell could just carry me to the hotel.

That wasn't a half-bad idea.

"Well there was a bangle and two rings, I think a crystal pendant and- hey, you sure you're good to walk?"

"Sleepy," I mumbled as I leaned against the brickwork of a junk store. I would have to remember to stop by in order to get my pinwheel upgraded before we left.

"Come here," Zell huffed like it was an inconvenience but the warm smile on his face betrayed him. I decided it wouldn't be completely terrible to see how he felt about the idea of carrying me and flexed the mental part of my magic just enough to read his aura. Feelings of familial affection (which has a different feel to it than it's counterpart) swirled around him as he bent down and offered me his back. I climbed on gingerly and squealed when he shifted me so that I was adjusted to his liking.

None of the creepy feelings the drunk men at the bar were exuding hovered around him as he continued rambling about Odine's raise in popularity on the market even though no one's seen him since Esthar fell quiet. It warmed my heart to know he thought of me as a good friend, if he aura and chatty mood was anything to judge by. He talked about the different magic suppressing baubles for a breath longer before offering to help me find a more up-to-date junctioning tool to store my para-magic. I mumbled acceptance as he stepped into a brightly lit hotel lobby and requested our room keeps. Two rooms were booked, one for the men and one for the women. For some reason I had thought we would all have our separate rooms and was not quite understanding the concept.

I've never shared a room before. I've never even had a sleep over, except maybe that time I fell asleep in Selphie's room while she was explaining a particularly boring mission to Dollet where they had to make sure the communications tower was still operating at peak efficiency or some other technical nonsense that involved them escorting a team of FH techs to scout out the tower and check for crossed wires.

Or something.

"My bag," I jerked up, suddenly remembering the messenger bag containing all my clothes and even a photo of my mother stashed into the far corner of the pub's upstairs.

"Quistis grabbed it when she left," Zell assured me as he began climbing the stairs instead of taking the elevator. As I pointed this out he merely shrugged and said, "the exercise is good training."

As I nestled myself into his back I felt a little content knowing I had such a good friend, even if he was a bit of a screw ball and thought climbing the stairs with a tired girl on his back was a good idea. When he finally made it to the third floor he was panting, but in a relatively good mood. Something about 'not having pushed himself like that in a while' was mumbled when I asked why. It was tough deciding if that was a jab at my weight or not, but decided not to dwell on it as the alcohol was making me sleepy.

He stopped in front of his room and opened the door as voices both excited and toneless could be heard through the thin walls.

"Why did you guys start without me?" Zell groaned when he entered the room and every head snapped to look at us. I had to blink a few times before realizing I was still allowing my power enough freedom to see auras. Mixed colors swirled around the room, mingling in some places. Squall was in a corner at a desk, frowning as his team mates were sprawled across beds and chairs, alcoholic beverages covering every surface. Triple Triad cards were spread across the floor and in small, haphazard piles.

"We just sorted the cards, calm down," Selphie was grinning ear to ear, happiness swirling around her, mixing with the muted buzz taking over the room. In fact, Squall was the only one surrounded by a dark, sticky aura as he looked over his friends as they seemed to be enjoying their made up game.

"Squall has to play this time or there will be an uneven number of players," Quistis pointed out and I slid off of Zell's back, catching Squall's eye and almost falling on Jell-O like legs.

"What're we playing," I asked, scanning the mess in front of me, looking for some kind of clue. All of the energy in the room was giving me a different kind of buzz, keeping the exhaustion of alcohol and warm salt air away.

"It's a game our genius Selphie made up after our first mission with all of us together." Irvine was staring adoring at said girl as she continued her never ending grinning.

"It's like spin the bottle, but with teams and cards!" Selphie jumped up from her spot next to the cowboy to grab my hand and lead me to the end of a neatly made bed. "Each team picks a stack of cards and we all draw at the same time. We start from the top and work our way clockwise with numbers until the cards are done and then we draw again!" I frowned at her, not quite understanding the rules, but not bothering to question her either.

"Sounds like it'll get me drunk and make me do questionable things," I raised an eyebrow and it was her turn to frown at me.

"Well you're playing!" She huffed and rounded on Squall, whose eyes never left his jacket. "And you have to play too!"

"No," he growled, staring at her with steel in his expression. She didn't relent in her pestering for a solid five minutes, coming up with a few solid arguments that Squall shot down without blinking. After her last point was shot down she sighed once and looked at me with the saddest face I've ever seen in my entire life. I couldn't say no even if I tried. With sure steps I made my way to Squall's personal bubble, stopping a few feet away from his sitting form. He eyed me wearily as I contemplated my form of attack. I _could_ compel him and flex my magic muscle a bit, but that wouldn't be very fair. And would probably cause bad things to happen.

"Please," I whined a little, pushing my bottom lip out into a pout and blinking my eyes a few times before taking a shaking breath. He looked wholly unconvinced and it was time to bring out the big guns.

Bargaining.

"If we lose I'll keep my mouth shut the entire trip!" I pulled folded hands just beneath my chin and blinked my large brown eyes again for effect. His gaze was sucked in and my completely natural and non magical charms were totally working. He gave an aggravated sigh before leveling me with a cold look.

"And if we somehow manage to win this?"

"Dealers choice?" I lowered my hands and played with the zipper of his jacket. The movement stole his gaze and he seemed to realize for probably the third time that I was still in possession of it.

"I'm the dealer!" Selphie called out before an uproar of voices began arguing that _they should definitely get to pick this time_ while Squall simply stared at my fingers.

"If we win you keep the jacket," Squall growled in a low, guttural voice that had my stomach doing weird flips. His aura switched from the dark swirling colors to light golds and yellows, they were still tinged with the dark blacks clinging to Squall's back. None of his teammates heard the exchange as he pushed past me to sit on the edge of one of the beds and looked at me expectantly. My alcohol addled brain was trying to comprehend why he would want to chance losing such a warm and wonderful smelling garment when it gave up.

"So we both are offering something," I raised an eyebrow and he gave one nod before the group came to a very loud agreement that couldn't be heard over the loud banging on the door to 'keep it down in there.'

* * *

 **Squall**

* * *

I've never in my life seen someone pick up Selphie's terribly made up 'spin the bottle' game as fast as Rinoa. Her beaming smile as she looked over our hand of cards was infectious and I couldn't keep the chuckle down as she _commanded_ Zell to play the rest of the game with his clothes on backwards. Luckily when our numbers fell short I was saved all the embarrassing 'get to know you better' questions as Rinoa seemed to take it upon herself to 'jump in the line of fire' so to speak and answer them herself. I've known this group for a long time and yet…

I don't think I've ever told them where I was born or what my favorite book is. I know for a fact I've never told them the name of my favorite song or even if I like going to see plays. All of the 'sexual acts' were reserved for Selphie and Irvine. I was a little jealous, watching them make out sloppily with a lime in their mouths. After every round someone in each team had to take a shot and I was downing a lot of them.

When it was time to re-up on alcohol I was only a little upset when Rinoa stood on shaking legs to help guide Zell to the door. They stood so close together and something dark crept up my spine and made my stomach tie itself in knots.

 _'She needs a guy that's going to pay attention to her, Zell could do that,'_ I didn't even ponder why I cared as she looked over her shoulder to stick her tongue out at me. Ten minutes went by and I felt awkward sitting on the edge of the rumpled bed waiting for Rinoa to return. Irvine and Selphie were not-so-quietly making plans to sneak out later and make out loudly under the stars while Quistis was studying me with a growing smirk rising on her lips.

"What," I growled at her as she began making her way over to me.

"You're having fun."

"I was coerced."

"You're still enjoying yourself."

"Anything to keep her quiet," I groaned, shifting awkwardly in my spot under her gaze. ' _though her voice is kind of nice.'_ I blinked at the thought while Quistis simply sighed, deciding that arguing wasn't worth the effort.

"One of these days you're going to like _someone_." She shook her head as Zell pushed opened the door and waited patiently for Rinoa to carry in her haul of candy colored bottles. My eyes made their way to her smiling face as she gently kicked Zell in the shin and laughed at his 'outraged' whine.

' _You're not good enough,'_ the other voice reminded me. ' _If you get your hopes up you'll get let down. It's best not to get involved.'_ The hissing began again as Rinoa sat next to me and offered me a taste of her drink. I shook my head and she shrugged while everyone got ready to play the last few hands. Soon the game would be over and I could kick everyone into the other room so I could get some sleep.

My eyes kept straying to Rinoa as everyone shuffled their decks for the last drawing of the night. My jacket engulfed her in fluff and faux fur. occasionally I could almost catch her sniffing the fur around her neck and was half wondering if my jacket smelled bad or... if she liked the way it smelled. The thought was both appealing and confusing as I furrowed my brows and scowled at our hand. They were decent cards with slightly above average numbers. She looked at me for my opinion of which card to play and I shrugged, not really caring.

Rinoa picked our next card and we revealed it, only for Selphie to begin cackling like a mad-woman.

"You think she's okay?" Rinoa muttered, bumping into my shoulder. Her warmth surprised me and for a moment all I could do was shrug before my alcohol addled brain could process words again.

"Maybe the alcohol made her blow a fuse," it was a joke. I think it was a joke. The way Rinoa was staring at me made it hard for me to decide if the words came out in the right order and suddenly I cared very much what she thought about it.

"Was that… did you just make a joke?" Rinoa blinked in astonishment as Selphie's cackling calmed.

"Whatever," I mumbled, turning my gaze back to the brunette as she took Rinoa and Quistis' cards in her hand.

"This is the lucky draw of the night, and by lucky I mean you're screwed," Selphie was beaming as she showed us identical cards. Zell looked nervous while Quistis narrowed her eyes at her friend.

"What's this mean?" Rinoa asked as I leaned back on my palms, waiting for whatever torment Selphie had planned.

"This, darlings, means you are to do whatever I say for the next four turns _and_ the game has effectively ended once I'm finished with you."

"Wonderful, we're so screwed," Zell groaned as he placed his head in his gloved hand.

"And rightly so, I have decided that the two losing teams shall kiss!"

"Selphie," A warning tone from Irvine had her frowning. Nerves began bundling up in my stomach at the thought of kissing Rinoa. The two holding their winning card began hushed whispers proving them capable of making plans without the rest of the room knowing. Rinoa fidgeted in her seat until Selphie cleared her throat, looking mollified.

"As I said, the losers will kiss…" her dramatic pause was making the weird feeling in my stomach affecting my breathing and it was hard to catch a full breath. "… a member from the opposing team." The nerves receded almost immediately to be replaced with that dark gut wrenching feeling that could only be described as jealousy.

I have no right, _no right_ , to feel this way about a girl that makes me want to pull my hair out. She may be kind and funny, with deep eyes like pools of melted chocolate but she is far too good for the likes of me and… and…

As I was coming to terms with the possibility that I might, **_might_** , have affectionate attachments to Rinoa, Quistis began beaming, her eyes bouncing from me, to Rinoa, and back again.

"Are there any rules to this kiss?" Quistis asked without moving her sights anywhere but us.

"Gotta last three seconds, be on the mouth, and each team member has to pick a victim." Selphie was rubbing her hands together in an attempt to look like an evil master mind and she was succeeding, albeit a drunk one.

"I choose Rinoa," Quistis' grin was just as malicious as she stood and made her way over to the poor girl. Wide brown eyes looked on in disbelief as Quistis' lips met hers. Three long seconds ticked away before the blonde pulled away, giggling a little.

"Wasn't so bad, was it?" Irvine asked from his seat in the sideline. Quistis shot him a stern look as Rinoa blinked a couple times before shaking her head.

"Zell's turn!" Selphie jumped up and down in her seat as her eyes fixed on the poor boy.

"She's like a sister to me!" Zell groaned out and that dark jealousy building in my stomach subsided. _A sister? He looks at her like a sister?_ Rinoa smiled at him.

"Just don't think about it and it'll be over soon." Her voice was small, but hopeful and he nodded, skulking towards her like he was on his way to his funeral. Rinoa didn't seem put off by his childish antics, giving me hope that she felt the same way. Their kiss seemed shorter and more awkward than the one Quistis planted on Rinoa.

When Rinoa's turn came her decision seemed to be easy as she almost tumbled into Quistis' lap, fulfilling Irvine's hopes for a second viewing.

All eyes were soon on me as my decision had to be made and for a brief moment, contrary to earlier thoughts, I wished Rinoa was on the other team. I got up slowly and weighed my options, feeling the full force of the alcohol in my heavy limbs and slow decision making skills. Finally I decided upon Zell, as it would be awkward but at least I wouldn't be messing with Quistis' head by planting a kiss on her that meant nothing. I'm not exactly sure if she still harbors that crush on me but I'd rather not hurt her. Besides Zell will understand. My steps were sluggish and a few feet away from where Zell was sitting next to Rinoa Irvine's large cowboy boot kicked outwards, tripping me.

I would have cursed at him if Rinoa hadn't jumped up to help me steady myself and our eyes locked. They were so very deep, like never-ending pools of deep amber. Words were spoken and I could have sworn I heard Selphie relent in her quest for kisses when Irvine picked her up and toted her off to do whatever.

"You okay?" Rinoa asked, concern painting her words and causing me to blink back the trance I had been in.

"Just tired," I mumbled, placing my hand on hers. I had every intention of pulling her hand away from me, but my lead-filled appendages wouldn't cooperate.

"Here, let's get you in bed," Rinoa's voice was small as she guided me to one of the beds and helped me sit.

 _'She's too good, far too good.' 'You'll never deserve her as long as you live.' 'She belongs with someone that will take care of her, not require to be taken care of.' 'You're better off alone.'_

The hissing thoughts wouldn't leave me alone and it was causing the room to spin. Rinoa bit her lips before pressing her fingers to my forehead, in the very center just shy of my scar, and muttered something I couldn't hear.

Immediately the thoughts were gone. I could have kissed her then if not for the awkward tension hanging in the air. Zell and Quistis were in the room, muttering in the corner and I wasn't sure exactly how sober either of us were.

"Time for sleep," Rinoa mumbled to me before pushing me down onto the bed. I didn't argue as someone flipped the lights off and covers were drawn over me.

* * *

 **A/N**

I was debating whether I should post this or rewrite it but I kind of like it so now it's posted and finalized. Very card centric the last few chapters, but I decided not to get into a lot of card details on this one cause numbers hurt my head right now. I hope you'll forgive the lack of detail on every turn but I didn't want to make this to-to long. Anyway, _next_ chapter they're on the train and onto timber!

Lemme know what you think cause feedback makes me wanna write faster!


	10. Chapter 10

**Rinoa**

* * *

Squall was out like a light. My head was still fuzzy and the alcohol was doing wonders paired with the sudden headache assaulting me, but he looked peaceful in his sleep.

' _not good enough,'_ hissed in the back of my head and I frowned, swaying a little as I reached for the light switch. Zell and Quistis made their way to our room, making plans for our trip to Timber. I wanted to mention the forest owls, but my head was throbbing and the room was spinning way to quickly for me to even think about opening my mouth to talk. Quistis' strawberry lip balm was still covering my lips and Squall's jacket was still draped over me.

Gentle hands guided me to bed and I blinked as spiky blonde hair and jagged black lines filled my vision.

"Think it's her first night of heavy drinking?" a disembodied voice called as my vision became little more than swirling colors.

"It's possible." This voice was closer and deeper.

"You know, Irvine saved you today," the first voice began as I closed my eyes and listened. My friends were talking, but the pounding in my skull mixed with alcohol and the weird hissing voice in the back of my head made it difficult to remember which ones.

"Tell me about it. I thought I was going to die," the second voice huffed as bedsprings compressed under the weight of a body.

I rolled over as the voices became hushed beneath the sound of hissing. I gripped at my ears, trying to will it away. I had taken this from Squall. That dark feeling pulsing in his head was too much for me to watch him suffer through. Now it was clawing its way through my brain, looking for something it could use against me. I'm a million percent sure this is some kind of curse, but who does Squall know that would force such a disgusting thing on him?

I scrunched my eyes closed and willed the thing into an imaginary glass jar, complete with lid. As the pounding in my head receded I could finally feel sleep catching up to me and I let myself fall into the darkness of it.

* * *

I woke up with the sun shining in my face and profanities being whispered across the room. Zell had fallen asleep on the small couch in our room, his boxers half off and his hand stuck firmly inside of them. Quistis made an animal noise I didn't recognize as she threw his heavy shoes at him in an attempt to wake him up. I rubbed at my eyes, doing my best to focus on anything other than the tan stomach muscles trying to find their way into a shirt.

Slowly our room woke up, coffee was brewed and clothes were returned to their rightful owners. I felt wide awake as a hungover Selphie forced her way into our room, Irvine's vest buttoned haphazardly on her torso and death in her eyes. I gave her a halfhearted smile and offered her a cup of coffee which she took with something that resembled a grimace before sucking down the brown nectar and looking for her romper.

Within an hour everyone was up and ready, if not a little cranky and disheveled. Squall definitely seemed like he was in a better mood, all half smiles with his steel eyes studying us intently. I could feel his eyes studying me as I pretended to be interested in a painting on the wall of the lobby. Quistis, as senior SeeD, was tasked with check out and procuring our train tickets.

"Sleep well?" Squall asked, leaning against the wall, next to the picture. I kept my eyes forward, ignoring the butterflies ravaging my mostly empty stomach.

"Not as good as you did," I noted, glancing at him for a half second before returning my gaze to blue skies and painted vineyards.

"It was the best sleep I've gotten in ages," He sounded thoughtful. "You enjoying the jacket?" His tone was full of amusement as I looked down and realized I was still wearing it. I fought to keep the blush off of my cheeks as I shrugged.

"You want it back?" I asked, trying my best to sound bored.

"Nah," he shrugged, studying his gloved hands for a moment. "It looks good on you." And with that he sauntered off, his golden aura following him with each step he took.

* * *

 **Quistis**

* * *

The blonde had to stop herself from staring. Squall was really checking Rinoa out, in broad daylight, surrounded by people milling around the receptionist's desk. And he was smiling like this morning was the best morning he had ever seen. Not only was their plan working but it was having amazingly wonderful side effects.

As Quistis forced herself to look away and make small talk with the receptionist while they typed away at their terminal the blonde found herself planning a celebratory party once they got back to the garden. If all goes as planned then maybe Squall will loosen up a bit.

"There seems to be a technical issue with the train, the earliest we can book a ticket, even for priority SeeD members is 5:30 pm," the receptionist stated with a look of worry.

"Do you know what the problem is, maybe we can help?" Zell asked as he leaned against the counter, also trying not to stare as Squall walked away from Rinoa, a smile still on his face.

"No sir," the receptionist's frown deepened.

"We'll take the 5:30 tickets. It will give us more time to spend in Dollet." Quistis said with a sunny smile she didn't quite feel in her bones. Maybe they should stop drinking so heavily before a mission.

"Who do you think should break the news?" Selphie asked, leaning her head against Quistis' shoulder.

"The news that Squall is smiling or that we're going to have to wait until 5:30?"

"Second," Zell frowned down at the papers as the receptionist handed them over.

"Hey," Rinoa's voice called out to Squall. Their leader was propped against the exit, bare arms crossed and eyes staring down at the floor. He didn't look as solemn as he usually did with the little quirky grin on the side of his lips. "I need to get my pinwheel upgraded, do you mind taking me to the weapon's shop? They always talk to me like I'm incompetent when I try to get it modified."

"I smell a date," Selphie grinned widely, looking between her to teammates as they watched the exchange take place.

"It won't be a date if we all tag along." Zell noted, making Selphie's smile fall. "And I'm sure most of us need to upgrade our equipment."

"We have like," Selphie studied the wall, counting the roman numerals silently while ticking off her fingers, "SEVEn hours. It takes twenty minutes to get our weapons fixed up, we can follow at a distance."

"Not all of us," Zell groaned.

"What are we over here talking about?" Squall's voice was low and rough, but tinged with just a hint of amusement. Quistis did her best not to stare with her mouth gaped open that he wouldn't try to hide behind his normal brash tone.

"Train doesn't leave until 5:30, so we were trying to find a way to kill a couple of hours." Zell scratched the back of his head, trying not to look ashamed. Squall frowned, but for once it didn't quite reach his eyes.

"Well I'm going to take Rinoa to get her weapon fixed up, wanna meet up for an early dinner at the Bistro?"

"Sounds like a plan," Selphie grinned from ear to ear before placing her hands on Squall's shoulders and spinning him around. He growled at her antics, but there was no bite to it. "Show her around for us so we can recover from last night!"

"Maybe you shouldn't drink so much," Squall called lightheartedly over his shoulder. After Rinoa and Squall left the hotel Irvine stepped out of the elevator with the trolley of luggage.

"You're never going to believe what happened," Selphie started, her eyes glistening with happy tears.

* * *

 **Squall**

* * *

My team was acting weird, which is actually pretty normal for them. What was weird was the fact that they weren't trying to cling to Rinoa and myself in order to force us together.

' _Maybe this is their new approach_?' my thoughts supplied. I almost chuckled under my breath, causing Rinoa to give me an odd look before continuing on her story about how she met Angelo.

"I'm a little worried about leaving her in the Garden," Rinoa admitted as we entered the Weapon Shop.

"I'm sure Nida is taking good care of her," I assured her. The words felt funny in my mouth but Rinoa beamed, making my stomach clench.

"What has you so talkative this morning?" Rinoa asked, leaning against the counter. Without her long blue vest the curve of her back and the length of her legs was more defined. Her head haloed in the white fur of my jacket gave her an almost holy appearance and I had to remind myself not to get too dragged in. After all she is too good for me, even without hissing thoughts reminding me every time I look at her. Though I can't seem to remember why that is.

Where are my usual thoughts of doubt? As I forced myself to look anywhere other than her ass it was hard to doubt the attraction I felt for her. It was a physical pull for her form I had felt with no one before, but the way her laugh makes my stomach clench was almost sickening in a good way.

Maybe because I've pushed people away my whole life the gods have sent someone to wreak havoc on my emotions. I frowned at the back of her head as the shop clerk stepped out of the back room. Plastering a faux smile on his face as he saw me by the blade section.

"What can I do for you today?" he directed at me, not even glancing at Rinoa as she looked at the different types of screws and weapon accessories.

"I need my Pinwheel tuned up, some of the blades are loose. I'm pretty sure a screw fell out somewhere," Rinoa spoke without looking up. The man jumped a bit before turning his gaze to Rinoa. Immediately his demeanor changed.

"Well sure there ma'am, why don't you just let me take a look at it, I'm sure I can fix it up in no time," with a wink at Rinoa and a smooth lean over the counter he watched as Rinoa bent over and reached into her bag. It was hard not to stare, that's true, but this man when over the line when he reached over the counter and grabbed a handful of her ass without any form of permission.

Rinoa shot up like a rocket, her weapon knocking into the side of the guy's head. Red coated Rinoa's face as anger began boiling inside of me, but I did my best to keep it controlled as I strolled over to the counter, using my height to tower over the guy as he rubbed at his new bump.

"You shouldn't touch other people's girls," the words were out of my mouth without a thought, but Rinoa was quick to catch on, wrapping her hands around one of my arms and pulling her body against mine. She was warm and smelled like flowers, but my brain was too confused by my mouth to pick out which ones.

"Darling this man is just rude! And all I wanted was to get my weapon fixed!" my eyes fell on the odd arrangement of blades. And the metal bracer attached to Rinoa's left arm. It was an interesting weapon alright, and probably another one of the things she took from her father before she disappeared.

"Where's the store owner?" I growled at the man as he cowered backwards before fleeing to the back of the shop. Within minutes a familiar old man with worn jeans and a graying beard emerged from the store room, covered in grease stains and muttering something about unreliable help.

"What did my idiot son do this time… Ah Squall, it's been a while." The store owner looked between Rinoa and myself and a grin spread across his face.

"Your son was extremely rude, feeling up on a lady without permission," Rinoa let go of me and stepped closer to the counter to gesture towards her weapon. "I just wanted to get this fixed, it's a bit old but I'm sure with the right pieces it would work like a charm."

"And Squall here just played the part of yer savior eh?" the shop owner asked. Rinoa nodded, her eyes studying the old man before his smile fell a little bit. "I was hoping he would start thinking about settling down soon. You know, he's such a nice man."

"Oh I know, but you know military types, they're all about work." Rinoa looked over her shoulder at me and smiled brighter than the sun, I almost had to avert my eyes. "But he's a great guy once you get passed the sour face and mood swings.

I huffed as they began talking about Rinoa's weapon, thankful the conversation shifted form me to the pile of blades and loose screws. ' _I'm not_ that _moody_ ,' I groaned internally before leaning against the counter, my eyes watching the Shop owner's hands as he showed Rinoa the different types of blades he could attach and the different size screws she would need if her weapon blades came loose again.

Apparently it was a prototype weapon that Galbadia scrapped due to the difficulty in wielding it. One had to account for more variables than if they were simply shooting a gun. Rinoa spoke about it affectionately as they fit together a new mount of sharp saw blades fashioned in a circle. Once they were finished and Rinoa fit her new weapon onto the mount on her arm she tested the weight and her range of motion while I let the shop keeper fix me up with a new blade for my gun blade. It was a much less interesting conversation as he carefully screwed the blade into the fitting and made sure it was sharp enough to cut through fiends.

"I've got it," Rinoa said once it came time to pay. I looked at her puzzled before I realized normal civilians still pay for weapon improvements, while the bill is simply sent to the Garden for SeeDs.

"You're not a SeeD dear?" The shop keeper asked as Rinoa pulled her money from the tight pockets of her shorts.

"Oh no, I'm not all that good of a fighter," Rinoa shook her head, a sad smile on her face. "I would just fall behind the rest of them."

"Nonsense, you're para-magic is seamless." The words were a little louder than I had intended, but Rinoa simply smiled at me as the shop keeper rung her up.

"Come on, we have a town to explore," Rinoa grinned as she slung her bag over her shoulder before waving at the shop keeper and disappearing on the street. I just watched her walk away, feeling an odd sensation settle in my chest.

* * *

 **Rinoa**

* * *

Taking Squall's dark thoughts away transformed him into an entirely different person. He talked more, that was the obvious change, but he also smiled more, and gave more compliments. He even stepped in to defend me by calling me his girl, though I was sure it was just to get the creepy shop owner's son to cower in fear of the cute girl's scary SeeD boy friend.

I was weird hearing those words from his mouth.

I shook my head as I walked along the beach, letting the waves roll over my feet and lick at my calves. It was a rather warm day, but I didn't dare take Squall's jacket off in case he changed his mind.

"What is that thing?" Selphie cried out as she almost tackled me to the ground.

"Oh, it's my upgraded Pinwheel."

"That doesn't look like a pinwheel," Selphie tilted her head as she studied the weapon still attached to my arm.

"It was a Galbadian prototype that got scrapped like ten years ago. I just had the weapon shop owner give it some more sturdy blades since I'll be fighting alongside the legendary SeeDs," I grinned at her and she nodded sagely before turning her attention to the brooding Squall sitting on the thick stone wall overlooking the beach.

"So…" Selphie prodded, glancing between the two of us. "He was totally checking you out this morning."

"I doubt that," I scoffed, trying to keep the pink from my face. "He's been in a better mood today though. Maybe he just slept well."

"Maybe bringing you along was exactly what he needed!" Selphie grinned before checking her watch. "It's only one but maybe we should go ahead and eat. We can walk to the train station to kill more time. There's really not a lot to do here in Dollet."

"Fine with me," I shrugged as I turned to tell Squall. He seemed busy speaking to Irvine though, so I let him be in favor of more yummy fresh fish.

* * *

"Before we go, Rinoa needs a new junction accessory," Zell yelled it at Squall who was a couple paces ahead of him. I blinked at the exchange, a little amazed that all Squall did was shoo us away with a wave of his hand.

His aura was still golden, there wasn't even a small tinge of black still sticking around. I, however, was starting to feel the side effects of whatever bad thoughts Squall had been having. I did my best not to groan as Zell led me away to a little shop tucked behind the hotel on an alley. The shop looked like it hadn't had business in months, but the store clerk still greeted us warmly as we entered and waited patiently as we browsed the wares. There were so many different kinds of junction equipment, some coming with new handheld portable computers while others came with the standard receiver you plugged into your laptop or desktop to organize things like Eidolon junctioning or using magic to buff attributes like strength or defense.

The one I had now was just a storage container, something I could force magic into so I wouldn't have to use my _real_ powers. It was falling apart, but the prices for a new one were higher than most of the designer clothes my father use to buy me to keep me happy and compliant. Before I ran away the first time.

"I can't afford any of these," I groaned at Zell, feeling a headache blossoming at my temples.

"Don't worry. It's on me."

"Are you sure? That's a lot of money," I pointed to the cheapest one, which was well over 10,000 Gil. He simply shrugged and told me to pick whichever one I wanted. They had rings, earrings, necklaces, money clips, little baubles to hook on chains, even keychains. I finally settled on a cute pair of earrings and Zell grabbed a small handheld so I could set up my magic on the way to the train station.

When we were finally done it was billed to Garden and Zell was dragging me out of there before I could complain about the cost again. Quistis and Squall were waiting for us by the entrance to the alleyway while Irvine and Selphie were busy being absolutely adorable by the water fountain. I couldn't help but be jealous of how happy they looked, throwing coins into the fountain and making wishes.

With a smile on my face I extend the reach of my magic and just barely heard their whispered wishes as they turned to face the group, begging us all to make our own wish.

Selphie wanted Irvine to quit being a womanizer. Irvine wanted Selphie to fall in love with him.

I wanted to feel bad about using my 'gifts' like this, but If there was something I could do to make either of their wishes come true I would do it in a heartbeat. And so the rest of us followed their lead, each person making a wish before throwing a coin in the fountain.

Quistis wanted Squall to finally open up to someone.

Zell wanted to be able to get hotdogs two days in a row in the cafeteria.

I took a moment to think about what I really wanted before throwing my coin in. I know wishes are silly and for children, but if there's anything in the world I believe in its magic, whether good or bad.

Squall and I both threw our coins in at the same time, and I decided I didn't want to know what he wished for. But what I wanted was for them to accept me when it came time for them to realize what it is I am.

* * *

 **Squall**

* * *

I wished for the courage to fall in love.

* * *

 **A/N**

So super cheesy ending for the chapter but I mean with his head all clear of the downing thoughts who wouldn't want to fall in love? So, sorry about the delay. I'm not gonna lie to you and I'll update soon, but I am going to try and write more. I just got a promotion at work and I've been feeling better about myself so writing is a little easier this week than last week, but that doesn't mean next week won't have me feeling less than super about writing. Sorry for nt updating sooner tho! I know I keep saying thy're gonna get out of dollet and start on their super important mission of making sure the resistance isn't having any issue with galbadia, but i swear this was the last dollet chapter

theyre on the train next chapter I SWEAR

lemme know what you think about it guys!


	11. Chapter 11

**Squall**

* * *

"So which Eidolon do you have, Rinoa?" Irvine asked the girl. She twitched nervously before pulling at a bit of the fur on the collar of my jacket.

"Siren," she almost muttered the word.

"She's pretty decent," Selphie was nodding her head as we walked along the paved road to the train station. It was still relatively early, but Dollet hadn't been interesting enough for the girl in yellow, so we were all dragged out into the sun to bake as we made our way to the train. Rinoa nodded once before her eyes were downcast to the asphalt.

"I've got Quezacotl," Selphie said before looking at her junction bangle. "She's been with me since I became a SeeD."

"How are you even sure it's a she?" Irvine looked passed Rinoa to Selphie, who was walking on the other side.

"I can feel it in my booonnneesss~" Selphie made a face at him and I sighed. Traveling with this group was like babysitting five year olds sometimes.

A screeching noise came from our left and Rinoa froze as the other's continued walking. It's relatively safe on the road, unless a monster is extremely determined to attack something. I gave her a look as her eyes met mine and then she turned away, a frown tugging down on her lips. I could feel my face mirroring hers as she fell back to walk beside me, Irvine and Selphie almost oblivious to her absence.

"What do we do if something attacks?"

"They've already determined battle parties. You're with Zell and Quistis." She studied me for a moment before nodding. She began chewing on her bottom lip nervously before taking a deep breath. She looked ahead, her entire body seeming rigid.

"You okay?" I asked quietly. She shook her head before sighing again. She looked like she wanted to say something, but she kept her comments to herself so we walked in silence. It was an odd feeling, I wanted her to open up to me. I would have given anything for someone to be silent during these missions, but it didn't feel right coming from Rinoa. She was bubbly and happy, and always had some form of remark to rebuff anything you could throw at her.

But today was different, and it was starting to bother me.

After almost an hour of walking we reached the train station, only to find it deserted. Even the train attendants were absent, and that was against regulations. My frown deepened as we got closer, the scent of warm death beginning to hit my nostrils.

"You think maybe they killed a fiend and went out to celebrate?" Zell asked from behind me. I shook my head. I motioned for the group to stop and they reformed into their battle parties. Zell stood closely next to Rinoa and for a moment that stupid jealousy began bubbling up before Rinoa shook her head at me. I blinked at her a few times before turning my attention to my own team.

"Are you two going to be able to act professionally?" I asked, narrowing my eyes at the way Selphie gripped onto Irvine's arm, pressing her body tight against his.

"I'm scared," Selphie frowned at me and I shook my head.

"I don't believe that for a second. You're a highly trained SeeD, one of the best at our disposal. Act like it," my voice wasn't as harsh as I wanted it to sound, but Selphie huffed at me and straightened up regardless. "We're going to split up and investigate. If it turns out they've just gone out for a drink then we'll return back here." I turned to Zell's team, sizing up my options. "Quistis, you'll head your team, signal me if there's any trouble."

"Sir," She nodded and I inwardly groaned. I hate being called sir. These people have been with me for over a year, in Irvine's case it was probably just barely at the year mark, and yet whenever we were on missions, out in the field, or in front of clients they were as formal with me as they would be with an instructor or real leader. Instead of just someone who got shoved into the job and was floundering around uselessly.

"Don't worry Rinoa," Zell's voice was soft, causing me to turn my head. The girl looked nervous. Almost like she was going to throw up. "I'll keep all the baddies away."

The jealousy flared up again, but I ignored it as I turned on my heel. Irvine and Selphie followed me as I began searching for the cause of the train delay.

* * *

 **Rinoa**

* * *

' _Not good enough to fight along side them,'_ the voice in my head hissed as I followed Zell and Quistis as they began investigating the outside of the station. I gripped my left arm to keep it from shaking as my eyes darted around our immediate area. There was nothing to be seen, but it smelled awful, almost like something had died here. Zell and Quistis were taking their time, looking around carefully for any clues while I stood here trying to keep my breathing normal.

' _Maybe if you let your power out you can match them. But even then you still won't be strong enough.'_ My teeth continued worrying my bottom lip as I followed the two SeeDs around. It was too quiet around here, allowing the thoughts in my head to sound louder than my own breathing.

'I can't let my power out,' I tried to reason with it, but the voice began to cackle loudly at my protests. 'They'll kill me if they know what I am,' I tried again and the cackle died slowly.

' _At this rate it's only a matter of time before you end up dead anyway. You can barely defend yourself without Para-magic. That mutt of yours is close to the graveyard as well. You have nothing to protect yourself with but that power you keep forcing down inside of you.'_

I suddenly felt like crying, but crying in the middle of a possible battlefield is not a good idea. Instead I wrapped my arms around myself and forced my breathing to even out. If I kept this up my hyperventilating would tip Zell off that there was something wrong, and I don't think I can handle his big blue eyes looking at me with more worry than he already has.

' _You could always claim a Knight,'_ the voice gently tickled the back of my head. I froze mid-step. A knight? Edea had said something about a Knight. I stood there for a moment as I tried to remember what exactly a knight's relationship to a Sorceress was. Were they intimate, or simply protective? Did they ever turn on their sorceresses, or were they obedient lap dogs. Edea had told me something important about them, but for the life of me I couldn't bring the memory back.

As I stood there attempting to remember I didn't hear the hiss coming from a bush nearby.

Something sharp pierced my leg, and in an instant I felt woozy and drained. I looked down to find an anacondaur latched to my calf, tearing straight through the muscle. The scream emitted from my throat seemed weak, all I could hear was the blood rushing through my veins.

' _See,'_ the voice in my head seethed as my vision began to blur. I took aim with my pinwheel and let the weapon fly as my vision darkened around the edges. ' _You can't even protect yourself from vermin!'_

' _useless.'_

' _pathetic.'_

' _weak.'_

The voice's words seemed to be spoken in tandem with my own heartbeat. My body felt light as strong hands wrapped around my shoulders, dragging me away from the dying creature. Words were whispered but I couldn't hear them. Then there was shouting. Something was grating on my nerves as the voices continued back and forth, my vision blurring and the blood in my veins pumping louder and louder with each passing second.

Something inside me snapped and I could feel pinpricks run up and down my arms, the early warning sign that my wings were going to manifest. I was going to be found out. Anxiety bunch up within my stomach, making me feel nauseous. My body began to spasm as the pinpricks turned into heat, the nausea welling up to the point that I began gagging, the smell of death adding fuel to the flame.

I was on my hands and knees in seconds, my body expelling the lunch of fish and rice I had consumed earlier. My fingers dug into the earth as I could feel the wings pushing their way out of my skin. I did my best to keep them in, to force them back beneath my skin but I didn't have control. I couldn't see through the haze filling my vision. I continued to convulse as my body dry-heaved, attempting to rid itself of something that was no longer there.

* * *

 **Zell**

* * *

Rinoa was badly poisoned and wasn't reacting well to it at all. Quistis did her best to keep the girl upright as she vomited, holding Rinoa's hair out of her face as she spasmed. The air around them felt heavier the longer Rinoa stayed like that.

Squall came around the corner, his eyebrows furrowed in annoyance. He stopped short and took a look at the situation. Zell felt his stomach jump into his throat as Squalls eyes focused on him, cold fire welling up within their depths.

"what happened?" His voice was filled with icy anger as he stormed towards the blonde. Zell couldn't form words for a moment. "Well?" Squall almost growled the question as he stopped in front of Zell, cold grey eyes staring into his soul.

"She was bit by an anacondaur." Quistis' voice was calm and clinical, but her eyes were filled with worry. "I've tried using a remedy, but it seems her body isn't accepting it." Squall's eyes narrowed at Zell before turning to face Quistis and the sick girl now dry-heaving in her arms. Rinoa looked paler than normal, her skin was slick with sweat and Squalls jacket had been removed so that she could cool down.

Quistis placed a hand to rinoa's forehead and pulled it away immediately. "It's like there's fire running through her veins."

"Could it be her body rejecting her junctions?" Squall asked, frowning. Quistis pulled Rinoa's junction terminal out of her bag and flipped it on. She quickly scrolled through the list of available summons and magics and her frown grew.

"She doesn't have anything junctioned," Quistis handed the device to squal.

"It's possible she just hasn't transferred everything to her new junction tool." Zell was starting to feel sick himself just looking at the poor girl.

"What is she currently using?" Squall's voice was harsh as he turned to look at the blonde, all traces of his good mood from earlier wiped clean from his face.

"T-t-the battered money clip on her belt. It's a prototype, and really old," Squall nodded once at the blonde before kneeling beside the sick girl and removing the clip. Squalls face scrunched a bit as he touched the metal. He took inventory of it for a few seconds before tossing it to Zell. The boy wasn't prepared to catch it, and the hot sting of metal against flesh didn't help.

"Try another remedy," Squall's voice was a little less icy as he continued to watch the sick girl. He gaze turned to Zell for a moment before he sighed. "Transfer everything over, if she has any saved files don't read them, just make a folder for them."

"She seems to be accepting the remedy," Quistis smiled as the girl's breathing began calming.

"We found the crew!" Selphie's song-song voice called on the other side of the station.

"Zell," Squall's voice wasn't much softer, but some of the anger had certainly burned itself out.

"Sir?"

"Help selphie's team while Quistis and I handle this." Zell nodded, hoping Squall would take pity on him later. As the blonde began the walk of shame to the other side of the station Squall's voice called out one more time. "You have one more chance, if anything else happens I'm taking over bodyguard duties." The blonde nodded his head before sulking towards his other teammates.

The other side of the station was covered in monster blood and tattered clothing, but all the attendants seemed to be in relatively healthy condition. One was looking a bit green, but Selphie was already searching for an antidote.

Irvine looked rather pleased with himself as he beamed at the girl in yellow.

Zell huffed in annoyance before leaning against a nearby wall.

"So what happened?" Selphie finally asked as the frightened attendants gulped fresh air and began chatting quietly amongst themselves.

"A pack of anacondaurs took us by surprise." One of the attendants stood up on shaking legs, her hair askew and makeup smudged. "Everyone was so panicked we forgot to press the emergency alarm so soldiers from Dollet could take care of them."

"You mean the alarm button isn't inside of the emergency room?" Selphie tilted her head and suddenly the attendant's face grew a rather rosy shade of red.

"Oh, right…" she looked away from the SeeDs and began mumbling to herself.

"When's the train gonna get here?" Selphie asked to everyone, her eyes darting from person to person.

"We'll send for it now. It should be at cross station so in roughly an hour," a different attendant said before brushing off her clothing and making her way to the platform. Each step was punctuated with the firm click of her heels as she climbed the marbled stairs to input her information in the kiosk.

"Looks like we saved the day," Irvine smiled from ear to ear as Selphie let out a triumphant whoop.

Zell didn't feel as merry as his two comrades, his mind was still too focused on the sick girl in blue and the way the air around her was heavy with the hum of power.


	12. Chapter 12

**Rinoa**

* * *

Everything was fuzzy.

The air around me felt like cotton candy, my clothes felt warm and soft, even the firm hand on my back felt like static as it guided me to a dry bench away from the smell of dead monster and regurgitated fish bits.

I furrowed my brow and blinked a few times, willing the static and fuzz and cotton candy air away so I could think straight.

I had been bitten.

I had felt my sorceress wings manifest, had felt the weight of them on my back as the heat in my veins began cooling. Even now I could still feel the pinpricks run up and down my arms as restless energy hummed in my veins.

I turned to face Squall, his bright blue-grey eyes studying me intently. I opened my mouth to speak by the words died before they could live.

What should I say?

Sorry I'm too weak to handle a simple monster.

Sorry I sprouted wings and am the very thing you're sworn to kill?

So sorry I got food chunks on your shoes.

I opened my mouth again and he shook his head, the ghost of a smile tickling at the corner of his lips.

"Your junction device malfunctioned when you got bit and you spiked a fever." His explanation was short and bereft of details. Was he there to see my wings? What does he think of me now? It would be so easy to reach out and take the information I wanted and yet…

I fidgeted with the tie of my shorts as his eyes remained on me, making my skin feel warm under his gaze.

"I'm impressed you managed to kill the thing in one hit after it bit you, the venom of an anacondaur stings like hell, and it's teeth are serrated so it did a good bit of damage to your leg." He frowned down at the exposed wound and I followed his gaze.

It was partially healed, but the skin was splotchy and bloodied, pain began running up my leg as I continued to stare.

Without thought I reached down and the power of healing began humming its way to my fingers.

Before the spell was cast I stopped, feeling an unfamiliar surge of power from within instead of dragging it from the tattered device on my hip.

I looked down to find the device gone, panic began setting in as I looked around the immediate area for it.

"Where's my junction tool?" I asked, feeling frantic.

I had almost cast magic in front of a SeeD without that stupid piece of junk and it could have cost me my life.

"Zell has it, are you alright?" Squall tilted his head, causing stray strands of hair to fall in his face. I nodded, feeling my face flush with embarrassment. I must look like a crazy person to him, worrying about such a piece of junk. Squall leaned forward, his elbows planted on his knees, and he surveyed the surrounding area. He took a deep breath as if to steady himself before, very shakily, he spoke.

"If you ever need to talk to someone I'm here for you," his words were a surprise and I did my best to keep the shock from my face. Stoic Squall, king of cards and of walling himself away from his friends was offering me solace.

The laugh that bubbled nervously from my throat startled both of us, and he gave me an amused, but almost annoyed look.

"What?"

"I told you that once," I took a deep breathe to steady my nerves. "And it still holds true. I'll be here if you ever wanna talk." The smile that spread across my face felt more real than any other had today.

The sound of a train horn sounded off in the distance had Selphie 'whooping' on the other side of the station.

"We better get ready, she doesn't like to be kept waiting."

* * *

 **Quistis**

* * *

Zell was still tinkering with Rinoa's old junction equipment when Selphie dragged us all into the train. He was unusually quiet as he sat in the corner of the SeeD suite and continued to program her new junction tool.

He looked annoyed, which was odd because Zell loves tinkering with electronics.

Quistis sat herself quietly beside him and watched as he worked. Every so often her eyes would stray to where Rinoa slept on one of the two bunks.

"Do you have any idea why the remedy didn't work the first time?" Quistis finally asked as Zell began grunting at the money clip currently attached to his own junction computer.

"I don't even understand how she got this thing to work for so long. I mean, she didn't even have magic junctioned to her stats, but she has piles of the stuff in unorganized heaps."

"That is odd."

"Squall even mentioned that she has a very strong para magic affinity, but the stat is barely above regular for a person without SeeD training." Zell's brows furrowed again as he glanced over at the sleeping girl.

Quistis blinked twice as she studied her friend. He looked worn down and exhausted.

"Maybe you should let me finish the transfer. You look like you could use some rest," the girl offered, but Zell simply shook his head.

"I'll be done soon, and I'll take a nap before we get to Timber." His brows furrowed once more as he returned his attention to the junction devices on the table in front of him. Quistis shrugged, giving up before she put any effort in. It would have been a waste of time anyway. Without another word she left the Seed cabin and did her best to ignore the sappy couple in the hall as she made her way to the storage cart. Selphie and Irvine were getting closer every second they were alone, leaving the blonde to wonder when they were going to make it official, or if they even needed to bother. It wasn't any sort of secret that Irvine had been vying for Selphie since the moment he landed eyes on her before their fateful mission in Galbadia.

Quistis sighed as the entered the storage compartment to find Squall leaned against the wall looking stoic as per usual. It wouldn't kill him to lighten up just a bit.

"Same as always," The blonde shook her head before crossing her arms and leaning on the opposite wall to look at her former student. How long has it been since he passed his exams? A year and a half maybe? and then he was given the role of commander shortly before the siege on Galbadia Garden barely a year ago. He was only eighteen when he took on the role begrudgingly. Now he was nineteen, and successfully running and entire Garden as well as still going on missions himself.

Though he wasn't doing it alone, he was certainly shouldering most of the weight as he tends to do.

"How is Zell's work coming?"

"Apparently Rinoa doesn't know the definition of organization, or how to junction all of the magic scattered in her devise to the stats her summon is connected to." i shrugged, not too worried about it.

"It makes sense. Even if she is the daughter of a General there's no guarantee he ever planned on her learning how to fight, much less run off with equipment meant for actual soldiers or mercenaries."

"I'm sure her life was suppose to be spent dancing it away in ballrooms and marrying men with high ranking positions in the military and a big bank account to match." Quistis' eyes scanned Squall's face as she spoke. He looked thoughtful as he absorbed her words, but his facial features didn't budge an inch.

"If she really does decide to become a medic and help us, there's no telling what type of military men she'll run into." Squall finally said, his eyes seeming clouded with thought.

"Good thing we're here to keep her away from the bad ones." Quistis poked, but Squall didn't budge. Mentally she sighed. How was she suppose to find out how he felt about the girl if he was so good at keeping his composure?

* * *

 **Selphie**

* * *

The girl watched as the landscape flew passed her. The sky was still blue, but was slowly beginning to turn golden around the edges of her vision. Sunset would be here soon, and if Selphie thought trains were romantic, she was a passionate believer that sunsets on trains were double the magic.

The girl did her best to ignore the way Irvine's presence made her heart tighten and contract as he hummed a tune close by. He too was staring out the window, but every so often his eyes would dart to her, making her wish she could be more in the moment. Instead she was worried about Rinoa. And maybe a little about Squall. His good mood had completely dissapeared when he found her dry heaving under someone else's care. Maybe he was actually worried about her. Or maybe he was worried because she was part of the mission and she had gotten hurt.

The image of the sticky note made her frown.

The girl sighed, and that caused Irvine to turn his full attention to her.

"Whats wrong my dearest?" Irvine leaned closer to her, studying her face as if it were a priceless porcelain doll or expensive piece of art.

"I'm just not sure about what to do," Selphie groaned and Irvine pushed his hat up so he could look at her a little better.

"I need a bit more to go on than that," he drawled.

"About Squall and Rinoa. What if the whole card thing didn't work? I mean, what if he was just being nice this morning because he thinks it's his job to be nice to her?"

"Is he nice to foreign dignitaries that visit the Garden?" Irvine asked with a half smile on his face.

"He's formal. Uses a lot of big words and tried not to frown as much."

"But is he nice?" The brunette shook her head as she continued to watch the scenery go by. Neutral, but not nice. "Have you ever seen him smile like that before?"

"Once, but that was because Zell fell off his T-board right before the Garden Committee members took it away."

"He might not realize it yet himself, but he likes her, maybe not nearly as much as I like you, but he likes her." Selphie stilled at his words, not exactly sure what to make of them. Irvine is a playboy, but she really wants all of this to work out. Instead of commented she began humming as she watched the landscape turn from fields to trees to suddenly being filled with forests.

* * *

 **Zell**

* * *

There was no way what he was seeing was real. No way at all.

Zell furrowed his eyes as he stared at the junction computer in front of him in agitation. Siren wasn't even _junctioned_ currently. It took ten whole minutes just to find her through the stacks of magic held within the tiny device.

Maybe the anacondaurs bite caused Rinoa's systems to go a little haywire and auto-unjunction everything.

But that wouldn't explain why the remedy wouldn't work until _after_ the device was taken off of her. Zell wanted to scream, but didn't because he didn't want to face the wraith of waking a sleeping Rinoa.

Instead he gave up his self-imposed investigation and turned his attention to transferring everything to her new junction earrings. He didn't bother organizing anything as Rinoa would probably get upset if he did. He wasn't surprised to find she didn't have any saved files. How would she have even found them in this mess anyway?

Once finished he packed everything away so he could lay down and take a fitful nap before they met the Forrest foxes in Timber.

* * *

 **Rinoa**

* * *

The rocking of the train was familiar and comforting. Bringing me back to the days before Timber had secured its independence and I received the powers of a sorceress.

I was lulled into dreams easily as I stretched out on the comfortable SeeD bed, listening to Zell's occasional grunts and exasperated sighs.

Sleep came easy, but there dreams made it hard to stay asleep.

 _Running. I'm always running. My feet were pounding against hard earth as I kept my eyes forwards, ignoring the scraping of branches against my skin and the sore muscles in my legs._

 _There was nothing but darkness everywhere I looked, except for when my feet made contact with the compact dirt of the ground. Like a heartbeat a picture would form around me, gone again once my foot left the ground. But if I stopped they would get me, capture me, kill me._

 _I could hear their shouts. They screamed for the head of the sorceress on a pike. They wanted me dead for crimes I've never committed._

 _I kept running until my lugs seemed to give out and my legs faltered causing me to tumble to the ground in a heap._

 _All around me were brilliant crystals, refracting and reflecting light, giving off an other worldly feeling._

 _I looked up, studying my reflection in one of the crystalline pillars nearby. What should have been raven hair was silver, my eyes a cold yellow, almost gold, and marks of power etched their way along my cheek bones._

 _Behind me stood a man with deathly intent in his eyes as he raised his blade over his head and studied our reflections._

" _You die here, witch," Squall's beautiful voice sneered down at me as he plunged the blade through my back._

 _The pain was immediate and intense, causing a scream to rip from my throats before there was nothing but the smiling face of the woman that wasn't me._


	13. Chapter 13

**Squall**

* * *

Rinoa was thrashing about on the bottom bunk as the train began slowing down in Timber Station. Zell handed me the case with her junction equipment with a tired smile that said 'good luck' as he left the SeeD suite, following Irvine out of the room.

Rinoa and I were alone, the thought did strange things to my stomach, but I simply shoved it aside as I sat at the edge of the bed, wondering what the best way to wake her would be.

As if the thought was enough her eyes flew open and she took in a deep breath. Her eyes were wild as she studied the area around her, finally falling on me. For a moment she looked scared, with shuddered breathes and all of her fidgeting to slide as far away from me as she could. My lips fell into a frown as I studied her.

It was a look I had seen too many times in the mirror after waking up from a particularly bad nightmare.

"Are you okay?" I asked calmly as her breathing finally evened out a bit. She nodded once before shaking her head, a frown appearing on her lips as she took a moment to think about an answer.

"I… I don't know," She sighed, bringing her knees up to her chest. The blanket fell away from her body, exposing her pale skin and toned legs. I averted my eyes as I felt the blood rush to my face.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked on reflex, like I didn't have a choice. The words just bubbled up out of my brain, down my throat, and out of my mouth. I did my best not to look horrified.

I had already offered to be her shoulder to lean on if she needed to talk, but I'm not sure I was ready for it to be this soon in such a private setting.

I jumped off the bed, remembering how quiet and alone we were in the cabin. Rinoa studied my movements, her lips twitching into a half grin or something. I felt like my nerves were frazzled as her eyes simply studied me.

"I'm not sure if I'm ready to talk yet, but when I am I'll let you know," her voice sounded lighter as she pushed the remaining blanket off her legs and maneuvered herself off the bottom bunk of the bed. She took a couple moments to slip on her shoes and take inventory of all her things before her eyes fell on the junction device box I had absentmindedly left on the side table.

"Zell moved all of your things over while you were sleeping," I supplied as she opened the box and studied the faux diamond earrings. They were expensive enough that they could have very well been the real thing, but Rinoa had picked a simple pair. She nodded once at me before picking up an earring and attempting to fasten it to her ears.

"So how do the new ones work? How long do they take to attune?"

"Thirty minutes or so," I said while adjusting my weight from one foot to the other. "I wouldn't suggest trying to attune so soon after your…" I struggled to find the right word. Instead I frowned and gestured towards the unmade bed and the bucket sitting next to it. She frowned too before nodding.

"I'll hold off for a little bit, but I don't want to be defenseless. Timber might be free, but that doesn't mean it's safe." Her honey eyes seemed to grow a little darker as she spoke before reaching for the other earring.

"I'll be close by," I stated as if that should reassure her enough. She nodded once but sighed.

"You were close by last time and I still had my ass handed to me by that stupid dragon thing," She almost groaned as she spoke, picking up the junctioning computer and flicking the switch. Her attention left me as she focused her eyes on the screen, moving around magicks and looking over her stores.

"Stay by my side then," I huffed out, a little irritated. She looked up at me, her eyes seeming to bore into my soul before the ghost of a smile touched her lips.

"Alright, Mr. Body Guard. But no complaining if I get too close." Her smile grew a bit as I narrowed my eyes at her. She stuck out her tongue, much like some of the underclassmen do when they win an argument with their peers, and spun on her heel to leave the compartment. I sighed at her back, wishing for just a second that I understood women.

* * *

Timber was much the same as we had left it, the buildings were intact, people were running around the streets running errands and looking at shop windows.

Soldiers were milling about, rifles loosely in hand, but eyes sharp. These soldiers didn't bear Galbadian uniforms. Instead they wore the dusty colors of Timber forces.

Rinoa seemed both happy and disgruntled at the sight of the city she had once attempted to liberate. I had half a mind to ask her what put her in such a mood, but thought better of it as she huffed at a couple of children playing in the street.

"I could have brought them this," her voice was almost a whisper, I did my best to ignore the wistfulness of it as she studied the thriving streets and happy faces all around her. It was hard to imagine one girl bringing about the freedom of an entire country, even with the help of SeeD it took a month of careful planning, artful execution, and more explosives that I care to admit.

"How would you have done it differently?" My mouth was going to get me killed if the dark look in her eyes was anything to go off of. Any trace of her playful mood on the train was wiped away as she stomped ahead of me towards the Timber Maniacs building. Her aggravation was palpable, causing Zell and Selphie to shoot me questioning looks. I simply shrugged as a response. It was a simple question, how was I suppose to know she's throw a fit over it.

"You're not very smooth," Irvine chuckled behind me, earning him his own glare. He shrugged it off before placing a hand on my shoulder and whispering, "If you want to get the girl show her some attention, don't question her unnecessarily."

"Who says I want to get the girl?" I huffed at him and he shrugged again, giving me a sly smile.

"The leading man _always_ wants the girl."

* * *

 **Rinoa**

* * *

I could feel the negative energies swirling around me, but it was difficult to brush them off. At this rate my volatile mood was going to make me throw a fire ball at something. I ground my teeth together as I flipped the attune button on my junction computer before dropping it into my bag.

Everything around me should be filling me with joy. Timber is free!

Instead I couldn't brush off the fact that SeeD had given Timber something I couldn't.

 _Wouldn't_ , a voice in the back of my head hissed. I ground my teeth trying to ignore the sting it made me feel.

I could have used my magic to give Timber it's freedom. I would have been hailed a hero by the people, maybe even a god.

But If I would have done it that way I would have been no better than Edea, a controlling tyrant bent of enslaving the world to her magic and influence. My fingers trembled at the thought of Timber switching hands from one tyrant to another. Sorceresses were evil, always surfacing throughout history to control and enslave, destroying everything they touch. Should my power completely manifest, should my blood resonate fully with the power urging its way out of the deep confines it currently resides in, would I be able to resist it's pull? Adel and Edea, the most recent Sorceresses known to history, are both bloodthirsty monsters.

I have to get rid of this curse before I become one of them.

' _Carroway might have a way to suppress it'_ a voice that was softer than the other whispered, almost like it didn't want the angry 'almost-Edea' voice to hear. And it was right. Carroway _did_ have a way to suppress sorceress powers. I had seen it with my own eyes on more than one occasion. It was put up on display in one of the many cases taking up space in his study. Whether or not it _worked_ was up for debate, but Zell had an almost religious belief that Odine could do no wrong, as far as magical items went.

It only takes a day to get to Galbadia from Timber and we're here for an entire week. It would only take a couple hours for me to find the trinket and get back on the next train to Timber. Maybe I wouldn't even be noticed.

Absentmindedly I toyed with a strand of hair before sliding it behind my ear. It could work. I could do this. With Edea off in Galbadia Garden doing god's knows what, devil knows where, Galbadia itself was relatively safe. The only dangerous part would be if Carroway realized I was there.

I sighed before chewing on my bottom lip. If he found me I would be screwed. He would hold me in that prison for the rest of my life, forced to attend fancy dinners and boring dances and meetings with Edea. I could always use my powers to escape, but then he would know and all of Galbadia would be hunting me in earnest.

"Something the matter?" Selphie nudged me gently, startling me out of my troubled plans.

"I just wish we had time to pick some things up from Galbadia." I sighed, deciding a half truth was better than a full blown lie.

"Well I'm sure I could find _some way_ to convince our fearless leader that not all of us are required to be here. This is really just a diplomatic relations mission, super boring and very tiresome. Quistis could handle this in her sleep."

"And how would you get off the hook for this?" I nodded towards where Squall and Quistis were speaking with Timber's mayor. The man was a thin, tall old thing with greying fuzz by his ears and a bald head as shiny as the floors of the Garden. Squall looked bored, but that was usual for him. Quistis on the other hand was full of energy as she spoke excitedly with the older man.

"Oh I doubt I can get off. It's such an important mission." Selphie's voice was playful as she stretched onto her tippy toes and tilted her head to the side. "But I might be able to convince our fearless leader than picking up a few important articles in Galbadia could be worth the danger. After all, we are harboring the daughter of the disgraced General Carroway."

"Disgraced?" My eyebrows shot upwards and she nodded once. She studied me for a moment before her smile fell.

"He was the one that _implored_ us to assassinate Edea. We only got out of D-District because Biggs and Wedge are incompetent fools that just so happened to be under your father's command."

"I had no idea my father was responsible for that." My eyes grew wide before I took a deep breath. "How is he still alive if he's the one who set up the assassination attempt?"

"OH, no one knows it was him. He's disgraced due to the two lack-wits that let us escape," Irvine drawled behind me. I almost jumped, but surprised myself by staying calm. Of course he would be nearby.

"I'm sure if Squall won't take you I can sneak you out. You're not an official SeeD, so on a technicality you don't even have to be here. We were simply instructed to keep you alive. I'm sure we could spare someone to escort you."

"Thank you," I beamed at the two of them as they smiled back at me.

Maybe I wouldn't have to turn into a monster.


	14. Chapter 14

**Rinoa**

Instead of immediately attending to important SeeD matters we wound up in Timber's only pub where Quistis and Selphie seemed excited to play a game of pool, something I never would have pegged the two girl for.

"How do I play," I asked, forcing excitement. I was interested in learning, but my brain was buzzing with terribly mean thoughts. I know they're a part of the curse, but it's so hard not to believe them.

"Well there are rules and regulations-" Quistis began before getting cut off by Selphie.

"Just aim the white ball at the other balls! Just not the eight ball, cause that will end the game."

"Oh," I furrowed my brows as I watched Zell break the balls apart, one of the striped and two solids knocked themselves into the pockets while the others dispersed over the table. Selphie jumped up and down before positioning almost her entire body on the table to shoot one of the stripped balls into another pocket. She missed by just a hair, causing the ball to bounce backwards and knock into some of the other balls. I resolved myself to do my best to shoot something in while Quistis went off to order our drinks.

I failed miserably, but Selphie still cheered me on saying that it takes time to get better. I nodded once before leaning against the wall to study Irvine and Squall. I could have eaves dropped on their conversation, but I just didn't have it in me. I was stretching my powers too much as it was recently anyway.

So instead of eaves dropping I simply studied them. Well, Squall really. He was very handsome, even when he was scowling. Why does he scowl so much anyway?

"Here, drink up," Quistis handed me a drink before liberating my pool cue to hand me a different one. "That one is better balanced, you'll be able to hit things easier with it." I nodded as I watched her lean over the table. Quistis was lithe and poised and strong. The perfect SeeD. She even made hitting a ball into a pocket look graceful.

Maybe if I was more like her I would be worthy of Squall.

I frowned at the thought and sipped tentatively on the red drink in my hand. It was sweet with the bitter taste of alcohol lingering well after it was swallowed. The burning voices in my head dulled only a little, giving me enough time to concentrate on maneuvering the cue stick to hit the ball.

As I was poised to strike Selphie decided to speak.

"So Squalls been studying you all night," her voice was almost a pur as I hit the white ball a bit too hard, sending it jumping off the table and rolling towards the bar. Zell took it upon himself to retrieve the ball while I tried drowning the question with booze.

"He has been glancing over here fairly often. Maybe Irvine's talking him up to something?" Quistis tilted her head as she studied the young leader. I forced myself to look anywhere but the topic of conversation.

"He probably thinks I'm annoying," I frowned while studying a couple dancing in the corner by the juke box. My face heated a bit as Selphie laughed.

"He thinks Zell is annoying, and no one is as bad as him."

"I resent that," Zell frowned causing his eyebrows to dip in the center of his forehead. " 'sides, it's about time our leader took interest in someone. Can't be healthy to stick to yourself all the time."

"So how's library girl doing?" Quietist leaned against the table, taking the attention of Squall and myself. I motioned for a waitress to fill my cup while Zell sputtered trying to find an answer.

Zell muttered something about 'too busy for romance' before taking a shot at the pool table while Selphie and Quistis refused to let him off the hook so easily. It was nice, watching them all interact. They were like siblings.

'You'll never truly belong.' 'Who would want something like you as a part of their family?' 'If Caraway knew he'd willingly throw you out.'

My grip on the pool cue caused my knuckles to go white as I pushed the thoughts to the back of my head, refusing to give in.

'There has to be some way to get rid of this thing without forcing it on someone else,' I furrowed my brows in thought as my mostly empty cup was replaced with a full one.

I took a drink without thinking, only vaguely noticing the static feeling in my head as the voices seemed to drown themselves out. 'Whoever did this to Squall was trying to tear him apart slowly, to bring his self worth so low he wouldn't be able to really lead or fight.'

Edea.

The name bounced around my head as I passed my cue to Quistis so she could shoot for me. My head felt light as the revelation seemed to dawn on me. Unless she had some weaker sorceress under her thumb to do the work for her there was no one in recent history that would vying for Squall to be down for the count, and what better way to do it than have him tear himself apart?

It was a genius plan.

But I definitely wasn't going to let her get away with it.

 **Squall**

"Absolutely not," I growled out as Irvine began pleading his case over why it was absolutely necessary for the 'pampered princess' to 'return to her kingdom' and 'retrieve important whatevers.' The fact that he didn't even know what it was that she needed so desperately from her cushiony jail cell didn't really sell his point.

"Come on, this is an easy mission. You don't even need all of us here. Just send her with Zell and they'll be back before you even notice she's gone." Irvine leaned back in his chair. He brought a beer up to his mouth with all the intentions of drinking it until he froze for a moment, a terribly wicked smile spreading across his face. "Unless you would very much notice she was gone. You've been very chummy with her recently."

"She's the only one here that hasn't been bothering me for years."

"Of course that is the only explanation as to why you would be seen flirting with her on more than one occasion." I narrowed my eyes at the man wearing the stupid cowboy hat.

"I don't flirt."

"Normally, no. You stumble over words and scowl a lot. But with her," Irvine pointed his beer towards the girl attempting to play pool with an over-enthusiastic Selphie and a clinical Quistis. Zell stood back a couple feet, leaning on his pool cue with a dazed expression on his face as Rinoa continued to attempt to line up her shot. He looked bored, but that was merely a cover. His eyes were alert, scanning the crowd for anyone stupid enough to bother them. "With her, you smile, and allow her to wear your jacket and I believe I heard you chuckle at one point." I was frowning as I turned back to Irvine, annoyed that he was studying me so intently.

"What's your point?"

"She flirts back. And if you gave her the opportunity to go to her home and gather up a few of her belongings she might even warm up to you a little faster."

"You're not going to drop this, are you?"

"Just send Zell and maybe myself with her and she'll be safer than the entire population of Galbadia currently thinks it is."

I clenched the bridge of my nose before sighing. With what I hoped was a fluid motion I brought my own beer up to my lips and drained it.

"I'll take her myself. Quistis can handle all of this," I motioned towards the entirety of Timber. "We'll be back in two days. Any later than that and you finish this mission and send two people to come retrieve us."

"Can't let her out of your sight, hmm?"

"She's my charge, even if Zell thinks he's responsible for her."

"Normally I'd give you some sort of talk about how you think the world rests on your shoulders and you can't save everyone, but you're right this time. So don't mess it up." Irvine's feet dropped to the ground and his boots clicked on the floor as he made his way to the pool table. He relieved Rinoa of her pool cue and motioned towards me. She seemed reluctant to part with the piece of wood, and the reason became evident as she stumbled towards me. Her eyes were dark and glassy as she studied me a moment before claiming Irvine's seat as her own. She swung her feet back and forth as she motioned for the bartended to fill her cup up with whatever she was imbibing in tonight.

"I was summoned?" She finally questioned towards me and I sighed.

"I'll be taking you to Caraway's tomorrow." I almost growled out the words in annoyance, but the smile that graced her face made me glad I hadn't. If she knew how reluctant I was to allow her to even step foot in Galbadia as a country, let alone its capitol city, then I wouldn't have been treated to such a dazzling smile.

"Thank you so much!" she continued beaming as she picked up her cup delicately and began sipping on the red tinted liquid inside.

"Celebrating a little hard tonight?" I asked as she leaned heavily back and downed the cup without taking a breath.

"The voices won't go away," she frowned at her cup before setting it back on the bar. She seemed to still a few moments later as she seemed to process that she had let important information slip.

"Ah," was all I said in response before motioning to the bartender to give us each another. I had been fortunate not to have felt the dark thoughts that normally suffocated me for almost an entire day.

"How do you deal with them?" Rinoa turned to me expectantly and I frowned.

"Much like you are now, I suppose."

"This isn't as fun as last night," Rinoa leaned forward, her arms supporting her body on the bar. She looked paler than normal, and she was shivering slightly.

"You know, heavy drinking is usually frowned upon during SeeD missions," I mused as she folded her arms on the bar and turned her head to face me, looking very miserable.

"I'm not a SeeD," she sighed out.

"Well if you decide to join us on future missions you will have to obey the rules just like everyone else.

"Maybe I should have stayed home." She groaned out, her foot tapping restlessly on the barstool.

"In Deiling City?"

"Garden," she shook her head a little violently, which she immediately regretted if the flushed look on her face was anything to go off of.

"I'm glad you think of Garden as a home." I felt myself smiling as I reached for my fresh beer. Rinoa shrugged before reaching for her cup. Her finger traced the lip of the glass as she seemed to be deciding something. I left her be as I mulled over how I was going to explain to Cid that I had disappeared in the middle of a mission to attend to 'personal matters.'

"After my mom died Caraway's mansion stopped feeling like home and started feeling more like a prison every day." Rinoa finally sighed out before pushing her cup away. "I think I've had enough tonight."

"Want me to have someone walk you back?"

"I'm sure I can find my way. I know this place like the back of my hand," her smile was weak as she pushed herself into a standing position and began making her way to the exit. I sighed before downing my last bottle of the night and following her out of the bar. One of the others would cover the tab before they left.

Rinoa was staggering in front of me and mumbling to herself, almost as if she was arguing with an invisible spectre. My heart clenched, remembering all the nights I had fought with myself, trying to justify my deeds against their terrible outcomes. I frowned as Rinoa almost tripped over her feet and let out a few expletives before she looked over her shoulder. Her glassy eyes brightened for a moment before she scowled and mumbled again. I shook my head at her before closing the distance between us, offering her my arm to keep herself steady.

She studied it for a long moment before grabbing my forearm and leaning on me. The smell of alcohol was more apparent out in the fresh air, but underneath I could smell her perfume mixed with my cologne from her wearing my jacket earlier. It was an interesting mix of flowery and musky. I kept the thought to myself as we walked in relative silence.


	15. Chapter 15

**Rinoa**

* * *

I was nervously picking at my skirt the entire morning as Squall gave a mildly hungover Quistis a quick overview of the meetings she would be attending in his place the next couple of days. She kept waving him off with little concern, a frown on her face that spoke volumes.

"Squall, did you forget who taught you how to handle these sorts of situations?" Her voice was filled with exasperation as she finally stood from her cushiony chair and took punctuated steps towards her once pupil.

I sat up straighter as I watched the way her eyes narrowed at him while her arms crossed over her chest in annoyance. Squall only rolled his eyes and gave her a bored expression as she opened her mouth, surely about to educate him on the subject when a teasing smile spread across her pretty face.

"Now remember," she began and suddenly Squall didn't look so bored, more so he looked uncomfortable as she pierced him with her icy stare. "Rinoa is an important guest of the Garden. You are to be on your best behavior _and_ you are to return her safely back to us. No more than two days or Cid will never let you hear the end of it."

"It's a simple escort. It's not like I'm Irvine," he huffed out causing the cowboy to groan in indignation. Or pain. Everyone seemed to have had a bit too much last night even though it was technically against Garden policy to over-imbibe while on a mission.

"Just keep her safe," Zell groaned from somewhere on the floor, probably hidden under a pile of blankets.

"We'll be leaving now," Squall's tone almost sounded threatening but no one seemed to mind it. He motioned for me to follow and I adjusted my empty bag on my back in a nervous habit. He seemed to be in an awful mood and I didn't want to get on his bad side while he was doing me such a huge favor.

We walked through the streets of Timber without a word between us, causing me too much time to think. He had seemed to be in such a good mood yesterday, but today he seemed to be back to his old self, grumbling, stoic, and speaking as few words as possible.

I blinked a few times as his aura began taking shape around him, it was still a brilliant gold, letting me know he wasn't in the grips of Edea's curse. So what could be bothering him?

"Two tickets to Deling," his voice was gruff as he approached the ticket booth. He didn't wave his fancy SeeD badge around, instead sliding the appropriate Gil to the man in the booth before receiving two stubs of paper.

I followed him without a word, studying the way the fur in his jacket framed his face like a lion's mane, or how his agile steps reminded me of a large cat. Were all SeeDs graceful with every movement they made? Do they have some sort of poise class they take to keep their heads straight and steps almost floaty?

I tried to imagine Squall grumbling his was through an etiquette class and had to stifle a giggle as we approached the conductor for our train.

Squall handed over our tickets without a word and the man studied us for a moment before a smile spread across his face.

"I do hope you and your lady enjoy your ride; the trip's three hours long so a complimentary meal will be served in your cabin," the man handed the tickets back before motioning towards the train. "It will be the third room on the right." I blinked for a moment as Squall simply sighed and began ascending the few steps of the train, pausing only when he realized I hadn't moved.

He rented a cabin for a three hour ride? And it wasn't in the SeeD car of the train? I shot him a suspicious look before finally following him onto the train, but not before thanking the conductor.

"Why did you-?"

"Shh." Squall growled over his shoulder as we walked down the aisle. He counted the doors before opening one and motioning for me to enter. I frowned at him as he rolled his eyes before lightly pushing on my back and quickly following me into the cabin. It wasn't as luxurious as the SeeD cabin, but it was nice with a decent sized bed and comfortable looking couches, a small coffee table was bolted into the floor to keep it from moving while the train was in motion.

"Why aren't we in the SeeD car?" I asked one the door was shut.

"This isn't official SeeD business, it would be an abuse of power," he shrugged before picking a couch and sinking himself into it.

"Why a cabin instead of a regular seat? It's only a three hour ride."

"My face is well known in Deling City, if no one on the train recognizes me it will be easier to slip off once we arrive."

"Oh," I blinked at him before making my way to the empty couch. I smoothed my skirt out before sitting and crossed my ankles once I was comfortable.

"It's only a precaution. Unlike Irvine I wont be using the solitude to do.. well.." Squall trailed off as a blush seemed to spread across his cheeks. I studied him for a moment, tilting my head as he refused to look at me, his eyes were instead glued to a portrait of a woman dressed in stuffy robes covered in jewels.

"Thank you," I smiled at him before dropping my eyes to the floor. "And thank you for coming with me."

"Well I couldn't leave Zell to do it," he breathed out sounding almost irritated. He crossed his arms over his chest while furrowing his brows. "I doubt he would have thought ahead to purchasing a cabin, his face is as well known as mine is."

"You don't give him enough credit," I sighed at him while shaking my head.

"He's a good fighter, skilled in martial arts and handy with technology, but outside of battle he doesn't think too far ahead."

"Maybe you just don't give him enough opportunities to do so," my words sounded harder than I had intended, and as I looked down at my hands I realized they were once again fidgeting with the end on my skirt.

"So what's so important you're risking your freedom to return to your cage?" Squall raised a brow, taking the conversation off himself and throwing it directly in my lap.

"I left important keepsakes of my mother's. And Angelo needs her toys and…"

"Keepsakes I can understand, but toys?" Squall sounded a little incredulous. I rolled my eyes at him before leaning back against the seat.

The conductor announced the departure would be soon, the ending trill of chimes leaving the room to silence.

"They're important to her, and she's getting too old to be helping me in combat. She should at least be surrounded by her favorite things when I can't be with her."

"Sorry," Squall looked uncomfortable as the word sat in the air between us. I gave him a weak smile as the train began moving, suddenly feeling very nervous and tired.

In three short hours we would be in the viper's nest, I could only hope Edea would be elsewhere and my father occupied with his petty plans to undermine her.

* * *

 **Squall**

* * *

Rinoa's choice of outfit was… distracting. It was easy enough to ignore while walking in front of her, glaring at anyone whose eyes seemed to linger too long on the spot behind me, but now as she fidgeted across from me it was difficult not to let my eyes wander. It was a warm day so her choice made sense, a frilly pink top with spaghetti for straps and a low cut allowed her body to rid itself of excess heat through her uncovered skin. The powder blue skirt stopping barely mid-thigh offered the same benefits.

Unfortunately the way she kept fidgeting and shifting in her seat caused the material of her skirt to rid up her thigh, showing off more and more creamy skin with each movement.

I forced my eyes on the walls of the room, doing my best to keep whatever conversation she decided to start short. It was usually easier to keep my answers short and simple, but Rinoa had some characteristic that seemed to pull answers out of me. It almost felt good to see her smile and laugh. The pale skin of her cheeks turning a rose color filled my chest with a useless feeling of pride. This simple infatuation with her was going to be the death of me, especially if that skirt had anything to do with it.

I rolled my eyes as the conductor announced that lunch would be served soon and Rinoa looked over the options to place her order in. With as much as she drank last night I was surprised she wanted anything heavier than saltines and a basic broth-like soup.

"So do you enjoy traveling?" Rinoa finally asked as I picked a random option on the menu and placed our order through a touch pad in the coffee table. I shrugged before sitting back in my couch.

Rinoa frowned at my response and I sighed before giving in.

"The travel isn't too bad, we've seen a lot of interesting places."

"Like where?"

"In the far north there's an underground group of artisans known as the Shumi," I shrugged. "Moombas are apparently a step in their evolutionary chain, and they're run by an elder twice the size of the rest of them."

"What kinds of things do they create?" Rinoa tilted her head and leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees and framing her cleavage with her arms. I forced my eyes to study the window before my gaze could linger too long, but that didn't stop my face from heating up.

"There's one that builds really detailed model cars, but most of them work with clays and hard stone to create sculptures and such."

"So what's your favorite place so far?" In my peripheral I watched her lean back in her seat and card a hand through her hair. I thought about my answer for a moment as the landscape flew by us, the trees of Timber long replaced with the rolling planes on the outskirts of Galbadia. Unlike Selphie my home Garden didn't hold fantastic memories for me. I was trained as a soldier and got into more fights with Seifer than Selphie had pictures with her beloved Tribian friends. Zell had Balamb and his adoptive parents there, and Quistis always expresses her love of beaches whenever she gets a chance to enjoy one.

My frown deepened as I came to realize that with all my travels I had yet to find a place that really stuck out to me. Everything but my mission was just background noise. Inconsequential.

"I don't have one."

"Then you probably need to do more traveling," Rinoa's voice was light as she studied me. "Everyone has a favorite place." I shrugged off her response and we lapsed into an awkward silence that was only relieved when the cart of food arrived.

 **XxX**

Deling station was fairly busy when we arrived as it was late evening and everyone was rushing to catch a train home or arrive in Deling to eat at the fine restaurants or take advantage of the large shopping strip.

I pulled the hood of my jacket closer to my face as Rinoa followed me through the large throngs of people coming and going from the station. Once we reached the streets the amount of ambling bodies seemed to increase, but it was easier to navigate as people weren't attempting to shove past you to get where they were going.

Rinoa was unusually quiet behind me as we walked towards the residential district of town. Of course Caraway would have to live on the very outskirts of the city with a marble mansion built for kings.

Rinoa began grumbling as we neared her father's home, a chill ran up my spine as she began cursing the very man who helped bring her into the world.

I didn't exactly blame her, Fury Caraway was an ass that would have allowed us to rot in D-district if not for Irvine's insistence that we be set free. I also didn't know everything about Rinoa's relationship with her father, but now didn't seem like a good time to ask.

"We'll go in through the back," Rinoa frowned up at the house before cutting a b-line for the trees surrounding the mansion. I followed her steps and she kept to the trees to avoid the security set up around the building. An eight foot, ivy covered, brick wall separates us from the back of the large building, but Rinoa simply studied it before climbing over a slightly crumbling section with ease.

I mimicked her movements as I followed after her, only pausing at the precipice to scan our surroundings for any signs of danger. When none presented itself I dropped to the ground, landing in a low crouch before continuing cautiously after Rinoa as she made her way to the dark wood of the back doors.

Rinoa's steps were brisk as she walked through her former home, her gaze seemed like steel as she continued forward, not really bothering to take in the opulence of the place. Caraway liked his things shiny and wrapped in gold if the gilded frames on the walls were anything to go by. The inside of the house seemed to be deserted and a thin layer of dust on one of the frames told me housekeeping wouldn't be an issue.

After two flights of stairs and a maze of hallways Rinoa motioned for me to stop as she studied an innocuous door. It was made of the same heavy oak the rest of the doors were fashioned from, but something about it seemed to catch Rinoa's eye. She swiped her hand over the handle gently before pushing the door inwards. Before I could follow her she turned on her heel and gave me a small, sad smile. I huffed but leaned against the wall as she disappeared into the darkness of the room.

* * *

 **Rinoa**

* * *

Mothers room was exactly as it was all those years ago when she passed away. Leaflets of sheet music littered her desk, books of poetry filled the shelves of her personal study, and in the China cabinet filled with gems and sparkling jewels sat an unadorned bangle with etchings on the inside of the cuff. It was a pale gold, no thicker than an inch. Nothing special on the outside but it radiated power of it own.

I opened the cabinet silently, steeling my resolve as I plucked the bangle from its resting place and dropped it into my bag.

Before leaving I took one last look around the room, trying to feel my mother one more time. Life was so different when Julia Caraway spent her time in this room, but now even the faint smell of her perfume seemed to have been leeched out. Squall was waiting patiently as I exited the room, his face schooled into bored features. I shot him another small smile before making my way to my own room, intent on getting Angelo's toys and a few stacks of bills that were hiding beneath my bed, for emergency purposes. It's not like I was coming back.

This time I motioned for Squall to follow me in, and out of habit I opened the window to let the breeze air out the stuffy room. Squall snorted as he studied my closet, full of frilly dresses and expensive shoes as I stuffed anything I could fit into my bag. The last time I was here I only packed what I could carry, but since I knew I wasn't returning I grabbed a spare suitcase and began filling it with my workout clothes and a few nice, but not overly-extravagant dresses and heels. I dumped my jewelry box into a side pocket and stuffed the cash in anyplace I could find spare room.

Squall simply sat quietly, watching but not lifting a finger to help. Once I deemed myself ready I strolled to the door, fear spiking through me as I found the knob impossible to turn.

"Problem?"

"We're locked in," I frowned, staring at the door as if it would simply melt.

 _If you would simply will it so…_

"I knew this was a bad idea," Squall leaned against the wall and began studying the room.

"There's always the window," I pointed towards the open pane and his frown deepened.

"We're three stories up."

"I have float stored." It was a lie, but one small spell couldn't possibly be detected, could it?

It was an infinitely better idea than destroying the door and setting off the security system. Squall stalked to the window and studied it for a moment. We'd be landing in the same woods we had initially walked through to climb the brick wall surrounding this prison.

"Better make it quick, Caraways here," his voice was gruff and filled with agitation. I nodded and began casting the spell, doing my best to speed the process along so that the traces of real magic wouldn't linger around us for too long. Squall furrowed his eyebrows but said nothing as the spell washed over him. He grabbed my bag and then my wrist before yanking me out of the window as footsteps began to sound down the hall.

Without a single glance back we jumped, landing less than ceremoniously on the ground with little injury thanks to the lessened gravity.


End file.
